A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I know this is the age old question and i feel quite childish asking it but i am 24 and am a virgin. I have met a girl that i have never felt this way about before and i think we are getting quite close. But i feel like i have all the anxieties and worries that a young teenager would have. First of all, how should i go about getting close to this girl? I have urges to blurt out how i feel for her but feel this would ruin things. Second of all, what does someone do if she reciprocates my feelings- how do the first stages of a relationship work? thirdly, not that i am dwelling on it or anything but if it comes to it- i'm terrified about 'the act' itself. Do you think someone will be accepting of the fact i have no experience and probably won't be able to please her that way ( i have issues with my....parts too- not uncommon though i presume). Anyway, hope you don't find my question too childish but i feel quite helpless and worried and i don;t want to ruin what may become with this girl! many thanks! Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 October 2008): When the feeling is right, meaning basically you are alone with her and have the urge to kiss her. Do it! This lets her know you like her, obviously, and you don't have to worry about composing something great to say. You have to start somewhere. Either you will kiss again, and you won't have to explain yourself. Or if there is an 'awkwardness' you can try to explain yourself, like you liked her for a while now, etc. etc.
I speak from experience when I say, "don't let her get away". Not making a move because you are afraid your 'friendship' or possible future relationship will be ruined is just a "logical" way of not going anywhere with it. If she likes you, good you did it, if not move on it would have never of worked anyway and you would be wasting your time.
After that first stage, sex and whatnot will come naturally.
A
female
reader, blackberry008 +, writes (30 September 2008):
Just go with the flow of the day. Do not plan on anything on how to deal with her. If you want to meet her, just meet her. Do not think or plan on anything on how to say things to her because it will just happen. Trust me.
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A
female
reader, ImSoScared +, writes (23 September 2008):
First of all- It depends on how long you've been with this girl. If you've just met her, then let her know that you are a virgin. I've always believed that revealing things in the beginning is the best way before feelings get deeper and ppl find out and decide to walk away. As far as the "act" I suggest just letting nature take it's course. You'll be fine. If you keep stressing yourself, you'll make it a lot harder to FUNCTION! lol..just take it slow and you'll be fine..Good luck..
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