A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:It's not me. Is a guy I like, his long time GF dumped him 7 months ago and he is deeply heartbroken. As a result, he's always been a womanizer and now that she dumped him he's again on the loose fooling around girls. B/C he is being like that he saw I was interested in me and played me too.He then told me he felt bad about it b/c it's not the same to fool around with some girl than with me b/c he respects me and that he don't want to play me no more b/c I'm his friend. He even told me he likes some girl but she ir hard to get b/c she has a boyfriend and he don't know why he is after stupid things, he doesn't know what's going on with him anymore.What do you think, b/c I love him very much, first as a friend and now a bit more than that. I want him to know I love him, but I'm afraid to ruin it all since he himself won't know what to do about that either. HELP please!
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female
reader, synchrohobbit  +, writes (29 November 2011):
 I'm not sure that it sounds like he is truly unhappy. He may just be testing out his new freedom, and is not in any way ready for a new relationship. Sleeping around and not following up hook-ups with dates is not treating women like dirt, it just means there is a gap between their (and your) expectations and his. I think you need to reassess whether you should be holding out any hope.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2011): His behaviour, the cheating, sleeping around, are symptoms of not being happy and having unresolved trauma/issues, self worth conflict that it shows in his sleeping around. Its not healthy.Confident, happy men are not indecisive. They are Leaders, Take Charge, KNOW what they want and how to get it. This isn't this guy at all.I don't even suspect you have high self esteem and self worth as you find this guy attractive and his using you for sex as he must care. WRONG.Sex is used like a tool for this man much like drugs or alcohol in that it distracts, hides from what it is inside of him that hurts/angers/scares him.HE needs some healing via counselling. Your LOVE won't 'fix' him or 'heal' him or 'save' him. He has to do it for himself and take back his life, his love, his self worth.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (29 November 2011):
 I think you should cut your ties here and move forward, he has hurt you in the past he will do it again, since his girlfriend dumped him he has lost all respect for woman and he is treating them like dirt. Including you, OK so yes he may have apologised to you, but it is clear he was only having a bit of fun with you, my guess is that he has told you he likes someone else so you won't expect to much from him, my guess is he knows that you have feelings for him, if you want to tell him then go for it but I don't see it ending happily.
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