A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have recently broken up with my BF of 7 years. We had a split about a year ago that lasted 3 months. We decided to try again and I told him what I needed from him. In the beginning he was great and I was really convinced that he was going to follow up on those needs. He didn't deliver. When we were broken up I was flirting and dating other guys. I stopped all of that but told him that if he didn't deliver I would end the relationship and pick back up where I left off and start seeing other guys again. Make a long story short I had started noticing that again he would not communicate with me things did not seem like they were going to work out and in the heat of the moment I told him he should move out if he was unhappy. By the time I came home (less then 1 hr) He and most of his belongings were gone. In the past when this has happened and he has tried to come back or I would ask him back.He has left so many times I cannot count but he always leaves some of his things behind.I love him very deeply but we are not compatible!Him leaving so easily when I say something like that just confirms for me that he doesn't really want to work things out or love me.I don't want to get into a relationship for a while but it seems like I need to practice with men. How to talk to them, act around them,feel them out. etc....How long does one wait to start dating again. I mean just dating , no sex or intimacy?Is it different for guys and girls?Does this even happen any more?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2011): I have been split up from my ex 3 months and im ready to date again
A
male
reader, Daniel the love doctor +, writes (9 August 2011):
 When to date after a breakup, usually depends on the person-and the severity of the break-up. If you feel comfortable right now with dating, then by all means, go for it. You mentioned that you two are not compatible...and it seems clear that he's moving on...so why not you?
So when you're dating or going on a date with a guy, here are some key things that you should do...
1. Communicate. Communication is key, even if you're just dating. Find out the guys likes/dislikes, lifestyle, etc. Tell him about yourself as well, but keep the conversation balanced. Don't talk too much about yourself- or ask too many questions rapidly. That would just make a guy feel like he's on the hot seat. Instead, encourage more open dialogue- something that requires more than a yes or no response. You'll learn more about a guy this way.
2. Watch his body language and also listen for positive feedback. Check and see if the guy is showing you positive body language/feedback. Is he smiling alot,flirting,leaning slightly in your direction, keeping his arms unfolded, complimenting, etc? There are a variety of ways that you could check his interest level. So be sure to check for them. *And if you're interested in him, be sure to show positive body language as well. In addition, you should also mirror his actions (like if you two are having a drink and he's slightly shaking his drink before tasting it, or during conversation he raises his eyebrow, licks his lips, etc..then do the same). What this does subconsiously, is builds rapport.
Hope this helps! :^)
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