A
female
age
36-40,
*rincessjasmine
writes:how long do i wait before i move on? Went on a first date, at the end he said 'you should holler at me some time' i said okay, but im not one to 'holler' at guys. so am i supposed to contact him first?? i would just like to wait to see if he contacts me, should i say, wait a week?? it was yesterday that we met.
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male
reader, doublejack +, writes (1 September 2011):
Again, no... I suggest you do not contact him. While I acknowledge that is what he said when your first date ended, the main thing here is a guy's actions and not his words. If he's interested in you, he will pursue. He will call and ask you for a second date.
I'd say give it another day, and if he hasn't called by then it is unlikely you'll hear from him. In that case it would be best to forget about him and move on.
A
female
reader, princessjasmine +, writes (1 September 2011):
princessjasmine is verified as being by the original poster of the questionbut he DID say holler at me, so he put the ball in my court so am i supposed to contacct him??
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A
female
reader, princessjasmine +, writes (30 August 2011):
princessjasmine is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni agree guys!!
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A
male
reader, doublejack +, writes (30 August 2011):
First, I agree with the advice not to call him, even though he asked you to contact him after your first date. If a guy is truly interested he will pursue. I'm not an advocate of playing games, but expecting a guy to put in some effort is very reasonable and not a mind game. So if this guy is thinking of you he will pick up the phone and dial your #. That will happen whether you call him or not.Secondly, I'd say that after 3 or 4 days you are unlikely to hear anything from him. At that point it is time to move on, because he wasn't that into you. There's really no excuse for waiting longer than that to contact a girl after a first date, as he can afford to chat for just a few minutes even if his schedule is full. Again, it boils down to a guy making an effort if he's interested.For what it's worth, if I go on a first date and I have a good time, and I want a second date... I will contact the girl either the next day or the day after that. If I'm super busy maybe I won't set up the next date quite yet, but I will at least get in touch and keep the lines of communication open. And if I'm REALLY into a girl and the first date is going very well, I will try to set up the second date before the first one is over. Perhaps we won't decide on a specific day, but if we have a common interest we may decide on a venue (like if we're both baseball fans maybe we'll agree to go to a game). Every guy is different so this is just how I operate, as a point of reference.Best of luck!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2011): Just wait. He'll ring if he's interested. Don't bother to call him.
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A
female
reader, Trinklett  +, writes (30 August 2011):
 You holler at him?! Whatever. He should have asked 'When next can I call you?' People are different though. Anyway I say he should be the one to look for you. Don't know how long you should wait, but after a week or two, you should go out with other friends
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 August 2011): Let him chase. You do not ring him first. You do not rush into ringing him/chasing him. That looks needy and might feed his ego. If he rings, great. If he doesn't, he's not for you.
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