A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my boyfriend are only teenagers and would like to know how far we could go, we have agreed not to have sex until 14 which is a couple of months? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, AskEve +, writes (5 February 2007):
 You and your boyfriend should be friends just now, doing the things that kids do at your age, not dating and thinking of taking on grown up responsibilites not to mention "problems." Sex and dating will all come soon enough but for now I would remain friends but I definitely would refrain from going any further until you're both at least 4 or 5 years older. You'll only screw one another up emotionally!
Eve
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2007): This is an issue that comes up a lot around me as well, being a teenager. I don't know you or your boyfriend, but the general advice that I give to people in your situation is to seriously think about it.
Its good that your asking the question, because thats the first step. My own personal answer is to only have sex when you are truely, truely in love and quite serious about it. This doesnt mean just any love, but it doesnt mean engaged type love either. How close are you? Do you trust him completely, with reason? Does he trust you that way? I he someone who may hurt you or has hurt you, even not in an intensional way? Also, how well do you know each other? You have to be wise to the things people think when they are in love so young. If you notice, people tend to all say "Oh we're so perfect for eachother, we're going to get married when we're older and spend the rest of our lives together" only to fight and/or break up relatively soon. Don't fall for assuming its "so perfect" when you havent gotten close enough to know. Right now you may be thinking "Okay, but we're different." Nearly everyone has that reaction, and thats what you have to watch out for.
What I'm saying is just be careful not to be decived by infatuation (a sudden passionate, but short lasting love). In some ways it matters how long you've been together, not how old you are. If you can disguss having sex with him, thats a great sign. If you can talk about both of yours concerns about it, thats good too. Make sure you talk about it with him. A lot of times guys don't look at sex quite as seriously as girls do, so make sure he is concerned.
Don't give away your love (or virginity) to someone who doesnt consider as valuable as you do. If you don't think you will be with him for a long time AND have been, then don't do it.
Also, why do you want to have sex? think about this for a moment and actually explain why in your head. Is it to try something new, and be cool? Or is it because you are so close to him that that is the next step and you want to share that love with him that way?
And also make sure you use protection if you do decide having sex is right for you both and do it in a safe environment. Don't just have sex in a school bathroom or something like that because that could have bad consequences. If he doesnt want to use a condom, then don't do it. Because if he cares about you, he wont mind.
If you're still unsure, I would say wait a while. and if he tries to force you, don't let him. Theres nothing worse than letting someone have their way with you just because you couldnt say no. (And remember not to force him either).
Just make sure you consider all the possibilities. I hope I didn't talk your ear off. Its just theres a lot to think about. Good luck, I hope this helps.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2007): im going to say this only once.
please dont have sex at such a stupidly young age, have more respect for yourself and the precious gift you hold. sex isnt a toy or game. its a special bond between people who love each other, your sharing your body with another person.
and i mean love, not fancy,like or think you love.. at 13 you dont love this guy, hes most likely your first 'real' partner. be sensible.. wait till your at least 16 and its with someone whos special to you.
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (5 February 2007):
 I'm sure that people telling you not to have sex is just going to make you want it more. Just a few things to consider. If anyone finds out you're sleeping together your boyfriend could be charged and sent to jail for rape, regardless of whether it's consensual sex or not or the fact that you're both under 16. Do you really want to do that to him? Also the other noter is right. You're at a higher risk of cervical cancer if you start having sex early. If you do decide to go all the way make sure it's safe sex by visiting your doctor beforehand.
CD
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2007): Why are there so many 13 year old girls willing to have sex with boys? Where are your parents?
Please do not have sex at 14, this will put you at risk for getting cervical cancer because having sex before you are a physically mature WOMAN leaves you at risk.
You also are not prepared to raise a child should sex end in an unwanted pregnancy are you?
Please google, risk factors for cervical cancer and educate yourself about the dangers of having sex at a young age.
I work with a 19 year old girl who has had sex with only two boys and she has been diagnosed with cervical cancer, a life threatening disease!
I am getting a little tired of educating all you children who write in asking about having sex at 13, 15, 16, and so on.
What ever happened to being a kid, waiting until you are married or in love, having the strength of character to love yourself first and to hold onto this precious gift.
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A
male
reader, maxsteel86 +, writes (5 February 2007):
 I dont know... you could go around the world if you had the money. Far enough?
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A
female
reader, geogurl +, writes (4 February 2007):
 Well it all depends on how comfortable you are with each other. If you havent already you should maybe discuss things with your bf and see where that leads. As for sex, you're only young, you have you whole lives ahead of you. I'm not saying don't have sex i'm just saying that in a few home truths most guys who want sex at a young age like this are usually only around for a short time afterwards then they leave you.Now i know this is not true in all cases but you should think things through and maybe chat about it more before you do anything. Also if you do decide to have sex i strongly recommend you use protection. For your own good really.Hope this helps.Need anymore advice just message me.GeoGurl
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