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How do you get over someone you love?

Tagged as: Breaking up, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (13 March 2009) 9 Answers - (Newest, 30 March 2009)
A male United States age 30-35, *ndrew loves hali writes:

how do you get over someone you love? she was my first love and its hard cause i think about her all the time and all the memories we had and theres been alot cause we were together for 2 years. im not trying to forget her or trying to stop thinking about her but im trying to accept the fact shes gone and ill deal with that but idk how. and ideas? i really need help cause if youve ever been in love you know how hard it is. i loved her but i didnt love her drinking and smoking habits cause were only 15!!! and her always talking to her ex which isnt even a big deal. yeah we broke up like 3 other times but it was just so either her or i could think about everything. help.

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A male reader, Griffo Australia +, writes (30 March 2009):

Griffo agony auntIll tell you the secret and it actually works for me.

You'll have to do somthing a little daring. Be honest with yourself and ask do you really love her... Really have a good think about it because the next part will take some real guts.

If you really do love her the trick is to express your love with all your heart. some may take the time to hand write it in a letter, infact that is the best way. make it look all romantic, put all your heart into it as though you are giving her all your heart and love - it should be very special and beautiful.

Or if you have another way you want to express it do it that way, so long as you truly put all your heart in to it and make it as romantic as possible.

Once you've made it and sent it to her in the post now you will have to wait... it might take a few weeks it might take a few months but if she really loves you she will come back to you if not she wont reply, you may lose her forever you may make a good friend in the end, so now you have to wait and just wait untill to be honest your heart breaks and you grieve... once you get past the grieving process then you can move on.

I tried this once with a girl and i really liked her now after a year we are very close friends. she actually kept the letter i wrote her and keeps it in a special place one of her friends told me but she never tells me so i dont mention it because i had got over it and in a sence was somewhat reborn, and after a period of time you may become mates.

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A male reader, andrew loves hali United States +, writes (16 March 2009):

andrew loves hali is verified as being by the original poster of the question

andrew loves hali agony auntwell the problem is i see her everyday and we dont talk but shes a very LOUD person and i hate hearing her voice it makes me remember what we had.

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A male reader, Kevin33 Canada +, writes (13 March 2009):

Hey, I was the same way, still am. I am 22 and me and my girlfriend broke up after 5 years about a month ago. First everything and high school sweethearts. She wanted to see what else what out there, found someone else and it sucks. The one you love sooo much is far away from your grasp. I just found some activities focused harder on school. It gets easier as everyone has said. But you will not forget everything so don't try. Just be happy about what you once had. Whats meant to be will that's how I see it now.

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A male reader, andrew loves hali United States +, writes (13 March 2009):

andrew loves hali is verified as being by the original poster of the question

andrew loves hali agony auntgosh now she wants to be friends!!! help????

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 March 2009):

Truth be told you don't get over your first love.. It lingers on but in time the pain fades away and gives way for you to appreciate the memories. You learn from it, and you try to move on. I had that same problem when I was a teenager. I loved him but I didn't love his lifestyle and after ten months we parted ways.

You can't change someone if they don't want to change so if she doesn't want to then there's nothing you can do.

But try to appreciate it for the good, spend time with your friends and family and in time the pain will ease..

Someday she'll understand and hopefully you two might see eye to eye but for now i have to tell you 'when you love something you let it go, if it comes back it's yours, if it doesn't then it never was..

P/S.. Me and my first love are married now with our first baby... but it took 11 years to get here, so good luck!

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A male reader, andrew loves hali United States +, writes (13 March 2009):

andrew loves hali is verified as being by the original poster of the question

andrew loves hali agony auntbabygurl#1 i did tell her that she said " i can do what i want and im sick of you wanting to change me all the time i am who i am and this conversation is over and so are we goodbye" so it wasnt the best idea ive had.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 March 2009):

It never goes away.you can be happy that you got those moments in your life with her.I still remember him.I can still tell you how he smiles with his lips curved up.It gets ets easier with time.You need to take one day at a time.Years later its just a dull ache in the heart.I am definitely not in love with him now.Time is the best healer.

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A female reader, babygurl#1 United States +, writes (13 March 2009):

Well if u love her but u dont like her drinking or smoking then try to get her to stop if she loved u to she would liten to u!!!!!!!

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A female reader, runnamuck Australia +, writes (13 March 2009):

tell me about it .. its sooo hard when u do plaese let me know lol it sucks when u cant have the one u love sooo much hang in there mate

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