A
female
age
41-50,
*isslady906
writes:I have had a great relationship with my "ex." We have talked about marriage, tried to have kids, been everywhere together, life was great. Naturally we had arguments but we worked through them. He decided to take a contracting postion in Afganastain and had ran into some legal trouble as well. We together struggled through but slowly he got distant. One day he decided he couldn't be there for me like I needed and decided to break up before he left. I tired to call, no answer, I went to his home, he asked me to leave, it is very odd, in two weeks time we fell apart. He stays firm that he loves me and that I will always be the one but he is shutting down on me and giving up. I figure he is scared of Afganastain or the legal issues got worse, either way, how do you cope with losing someone you love? I feel like he is dying and I can't have my last goodbye. I don't know if I will ever see him again. People suggest that he is protecting me but a woman you want to marry is not a woman you tell move on and find someone else, live you life! Could that be? What do you do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 November 2009): Honey listen, you may not want to hear this, but please....take your boyfriend's advice and move on as he requested. He may have "some" feelings for you, but he is not "in love" with you. If he was, he wouldn't tell you to move on---even if he thought he would be in Afgan for the next few years...if he was in love with you, he wouldn't want to let you go, he would call you when he could and write you lots of letter declaring his love for you, but instead he tells you to move on. He is just trying to "let you down" (end the relationship) in a "nice" manner. Read between the lines honey--he loves you, but not in love with you enough to want to be with you. Time heals all wounds, pray, time, more pray and more time. And I am speaking from exp. It took me almost one year to get over a guy I dated and was in love with for nearly 8 months. I didn't think the emotional pain would ever end, but it did and now I am dating a guy who for the most part seems as though he is truly interested in being with me...only time will tell because, we just started dating. Some people get over someone they are in love with, and others don't yet are forced to move on which seems to be the case with you. This is one thing you must know also ok? Once you decide to move on without him, there is not turning back...please don't waste time waiting, hoping and wishing he will come back...just take the proper steps to get over him, and move on so you can heal emotionally--you want that desire you have for him to disappear that way you can love the right guy God has for you without lingering feelings about your ex being tied to your mind, body and soul. I hope this helps.
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