A
female
age
30-35,
*han x3
writes:okay, i have been dating this guy for almost a year and a half, and our relationship is changing. he seems kind of obsessive sometimes and i'm only 17, and he also talks about marriage. i don't feel the same as i used to for him, and i believe it is because i have matured more, and he's not following me and my needs as i'm changing, if that makes sense. in the meantime, i seemed to have formed feelings for another guy. i've never cheated though. i think i want to break off the relationship with the guy i'm dating, i just don't know how to do it gently. how do you break it off with someone who makes you feel so trapped? please help me...
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female
reader, XxAnGelXxx  +, writes (21 June 2008):
 I can totally relate to what your saying! My last relationship was alot like that, the guy was alot older than me, and also has a drink problem, and had a drug problem, i was with him for a year and a half, but because the age difference we wanted to move different ways in our lives, he wanted to settle down n i wanted to get back into college n all that. I knew for a while that we weren't goin anywhere so tried calling it quits, but he wasn't having none of it n threatening to go back on the drugs and saying that he's gonna drink himself to death, so i was pretty much trapped and felt completely helpless! But in the end i managed to pluck up the courage and just thought, stuff it n bite the bullet! Which i did and after i talked everythin thru with him in great detail and every aspect of our lives he accepted it, and we're still good friends! It was hard to start with but things are so much better now that we're friends and not in this massively serious relationship, so really i'd say just sit him down and tell him exactly how you feel about everything, and that it aint fair on him cos you feel that its not going anywhere, and its better now than later x
A
female
reader, Shan x3 +, writes (21 June 2008):
Shan x3 is verified as being by the original poster of the question smiles, i love your advice! i can tell you're good at this kinda thing :) its just really hard to break up with him because it would be such a shock to him, ya know? i don't know how to do it without having him say "wow i didn't see this coming" or something along those lines. thanks for the great advice though :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2008): I suggest you break up with this guy; tell him you are young and don't want to be in such a serious relationship yet.Offer your friendship.
Yes,it will hurt him, but you have to think about yourself here; also the longer you leave it, the more difficult it will be; get it done with; MOVE ON.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2008): you just have to break it off, you will hurt him and there is really nothing you can do about it. If you stay friends this could hurt him more, as he will most likely see you with this new guy.
I suggest you just break up with him. He will eventually get over it, and then maybe you could be friends.
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