A
male
age
30-35,
*andomando
writes:When you meet a girl and you hook up (for this example kissing) how do you go further past kissing?! For example I went to a concert and I was a little drunk when i was talking to this girl I met. We danced and then we started to make out. I personally have never asked a girl to have sex or anything.. It normally just happens. But i have never been like functional(basically sober). If i was and she was functional and asked her to come over and maybe we start making out I feel awkward to ask for anything! My question would be is it weird for a guy to be so blatient and ask? I mean you can look at it as just a hook up and it doesnt matter whether she says yes or no but i mean I dont wanna look like a jerk. Thats why I dont ask.. its kinda been like touching leads to it...Is it weird when guys ask? or do we have to use code words idk like wanna see my place, see my room exc...
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male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (18 May 2012):
 Never in my many years (l'm now 64) did I ever be so blatant as to ask a woman for sex for the first time. That's just stupid and so uncool. All you do is make out, get her turned on, and if she wants more, it just happens. During the make out session her willingness will become apparent, or not, and you simply go with the flow. Nothing much needs to be asked or said. In my experiences, I might ask if she would like to go to the bedroom, and that was all that needed to be said. She says either yes or no, but usually with just ok and a smile. The rest takes place under the sheets.
A
male
reader, landomando +, writes (18 May 2012):
landomando is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for responding!
Sageoldguy1465 lol thats really funny maybe if im talking to a girl and she has a good personality ill try that lol
TrancedRhythmEar Good advice ya i have messed up relationships drunk..but the only thing is my guns are bigger then yours.. Not just saying that the weight room is my home. :)
BettyBoup I like your name and your advice! I thought it was a little creepy and weird to ask and im glad to know it is! Dont ask just go for ! thank you
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A
female
reader, BettyBoup  +, writes (17 May 2012):
 Well you're right, normally it does just happen! Just make sure, if you are just wanting a no strings hook up, that the girl is on the same page as you. Don't have sex with a girl who might be looking for a relationship with you, if you only want to have sex and nothing more. That's not fair and is taking advantage. But if you meet someone and you both want to just hook up, say in a bar, just ask if she wants to come back to your place. If she's up for it, she will go with you and it will happen. Just start making out and take it from there.
I would say don't outright ask, that would make me feel cheap. I have had guys in bars basically tell me that they wanted to take me home and do rude things to me, and well, it was off putting and I found it rude and insulting. But perhaps that was because I did not want to go home with a random guy and have sex! So that made me feel like he saw me as just an easy lay for that night, which is not what I want to be seen as! However, I have had the odd one night stand or fling with a stranger or a friend, but in those cases I had just that night wanted to get laid for emotional reasons, due to being down about life or a relationship gone wrong, and I see nothing wrong with having sex for fun as long as everyone is on the same page and its safe sex. Or the other times, it has been with a male friend and we have both been drunk, single and one thing just lead to another. Don't worry about what to say, just intend for it to happen, and if the girl is on the same page, it will happen naturally. Just don't take advantage or use a girl who is vulnerable and may want something more.
Don't ask, just go for it, gently. Test the waters, say get closer, start touching more intimately. If you go too far she will let you know. Or if it seems right to ask, ask. There's no rules to this, just go with the flow.
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A
male
reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (17 May 2012):
 Dude just lead. Dont ask. Dont suggest just lead them into ur bedroom and if they have a prob they will tell u. Take initiative. Stay away from booze cause not only will u fail to get guns like mine but u will risk emotipns n bad decisions with women.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (17 May 2012):
 Like you... I feel a little uncomfortable being so blatant as to ask a girl: "So, do you want to have sex with me now?"
Sooooo, I usually couch my request, something like this: "So, I'm a bit horny. Would you like to join me in starting a family now?"
Usually works... though I have gotten slapped a few times..
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2012): I personally have found that if a guy comes straight out and asks me for sex, then the answer is a definite no. It creeps me out and I tend to think he's a jerk. If it just happens then it happens, but if he asks it freaks me out.
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