A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:okay well i have been on and off with this guy for the past couple of years and now. we have dated at least 4 times. but ever time we break up i always go to the begging him back thing. our last break up he just kinda ended it, i accepted it at first but i still love him. its been a little more than a year since are last break up. i am still not over him and dont think i ever will be. i have had a few boyfriends since him but i could never get him off my mind. and we just recently became friends again. he has a girlfriend and i really just dont know what to do. how do i win him back?
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female
reader, SecretsSuck +, writes (2 February 2011):
Ok..... If you are the one going back then STOP!!! You are torturing yourself. Only you can change this. I have been in relationships similar to this one and trust me... MOVE ON! It's not worth it. There are other guys out there and trust me you will meet someone to help you get over him. I hope that helps! Good luck.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2011): I have to say something here. This is something I've recently dealt with. I've been the on again, off again type. Usually the one to break it off, sick of one thing or another. Finally, he did it to me. And, I must confess, I HATED it. Our situ is a little bit different from yours, BUT I learned quickly that moments together can be short, so spend what you have with him wisely. If your ultimate goal is to be with him, then tread carefully. Look at it as if you could have one more chance. JUST ONE. I liked the advice about telling him how you feel, and letting him keep on dating his gf or ending it. If I were you, I would follow that advice. After you show him that whatever it was about you guys that made things not work out before can be different, for example, in my situation, we both played too many games with each other, instead of swallowing our insecurities and just becoming transparent with our answers to one another instead. Find a way to connect with him on a serious level, get his full attention in a respectable manner, and then pour your heart out WITHOUT becoming overly emotional, getting angry, or becoming obstinate if he tells you what you don't want to hear. Then, it's like the Mariah Carey song lol. Let him go, and if he comes back to you, then he's yours. I've learned that you can't force yourself on people, it confuses them, or makes them run from you. Hope this helps somehow!
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A
female
reader, xanthic +, writes (30 January 2011):
 Leave him alone. Would you want another girl trying to steal him from you? I doubt it, so don't do it to someone else. Is the relationship likely to work on the 5th try, anyway? No, probably not.
You've convinced yourself you'll never be able to get over him, but that's exactly what's keeping you from getting over him. You have to realize you're fully capable of moving on. You need to accept that he just wasn't as interested in you as you were in him, otherwise you wouldn't have needed to beg him to come back. I know this is the last thing you want to hear, but I also think it's something you NEED to hear.
Don't hold on to the idea of true love and what ifs, it's only going to keep you hooked on this guy. You've tried working things out with him 4 times now, I honestly don't think this is meant to be, or anything close to true love. True love doesn't involve having to beg and convince someone to be with you. You'll just have to move on, as things are now there isn't much you can do.
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A
female
reader, cry +, writes (30 January 2011):
 tell him how you feel, dont let what could be true love slip away.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2011): well you said you are friends,thats a good start and i know it's heartbreaking to watch the person you love, love someone else. just stay friends and grow closer, slowly.
WAIT you have to tell this guy how you feel though.
tell him how much you miss him and love him, maybe it can change his heart to,
if his relationship doesn't end with the other girl, then theres nothing much you can do, because you can't stop someone from loving someone else, try not to affect their relationship because it will just look bad on you, let them live, if they break up, you've got your chance, if they don't then :/
its just important you let him know how you feel,
goodluck.
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