A
female
 ,
anonymous
writes:I broke up with my boyfriend a while ago , and i thought it would be easy to let go of him and start again with some other person . but i still love him and have begun to miss him , is there a way i can stop the feelings i have for him ?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2006): I've recently broken up with my boyfriend as well, and still love him and miss him very much. As the "dumper", it is quite hard because the ended relationship was in your hands, so you find yourself asking if you've done the right thing, or if you just threw everything away.
My advice: trust your judgements. Your first instincts are normally the right ones. You ended this relationship for a reason/reasons that only you know. Think about how you felt before the break up, whether it be frustrated, suffocated, or just not happy anymore. I'm sure if you were to rekindle things with your ex you'd be happy for a while, but those underlying feelings and problems would still be there and you'd be no better off now than you were before the break up.
So bottom line: think about why you broke up. Write a list of the reasons why it is good that you broke up. If it's shorter than the list of reasons why you should've stayed together, maybe you should give him a call.
Good luck :)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 September 2006): Hi there,I feel for you as I have just split up with my boyfriend of 4 years. I still love him and I do miss him but thats because I was used to having him there. I guess this is probably the same for you. I didn't want to be with him for some time and eventually plucked up the courage to finish it. When you do it hits you hard as You can't just phone them up when you feel like it anymore. Maybe try and be friends at a later stage - it's very sad if you can't be after a long time together. To try and get over him just remember break-ups are never easy. Go out with friends, go on holiday, don't rush into another relationship as a substitute - I did so and found this was a silly thing to do - I would say wait at least 6 months. If you need to talk let me know and I will be happy to. Take care. x
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A
female
reader, j115 +, writes (4 September 2006):
i'm in the same situation, i was with my ex for 6 1/2 years,but when we split it was not by my choice.
i'm still struggling to get over him and still love him deep inside. i have found that my mind tends to wonder when im alone and not busy. it has helped that i have taken pictures down and cleared away anything that was his.
however im only now slowly starting to get over him and getting stronger each day, it just takes time. i found that by keeping busy has helped and being with friends. also talking to someone who has been through the same situation is also useful and you realise that you arent going mad as they have reacted to their split in the same way, or even talking someone close.
i've even taken up swimming and go twice a week. when i get lonely and miss him thats when i will just do something be it just going out to tesco just to have a nosey or browsing on the net, odd but it did help me.
it is a slow process and takes time but eventually you will get over him and find that you dont think about him as much.
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