A
male
age
30-35,
*ellium
writes:Hi everyone, I wrote 2 days ago about a problem of mine's. I got 2 direct answers, direct from women. I don't believe that they lie, but I donw want to believe that they are right... Its about a girl that has been coming very close to me in the past few weeks. The hook in all this is that she has a boyfriend (witch is an Asshole). Now, I got told here that she is using me, witch is plausible due to circumstances. If It's so, then she is a good Actress, no damn doubt. But she alsways was so naive, aldough intelligent. You see, I never had a girlfriend neither I got to kiss a Girl or have sex with one. THis girl is the fist one on witch I had the chance to have my first kiss, but I passed. I'd be pleased if you read my last question so you can understand my situation right now.http://www.dearcupid.org/question/the-new-world-for-a-man-how-do.html I'm a pretty lonely person, moved here to germany 1 year ago, and she is one of the first persons I got to know here. Despite her I don't really have anyone with who I can talk openly about this things.. My question is: How can I get out if she is using me, If it is the case? Should I directly ask her? Because if she isn't, I guess I will be screwed forever with her, because of lack of trust :-SIf she actually is trying to use me, how do I couter her moves? I know I'm foolish but I'm also desperate, and I hate luck games; got hurt to often till now...I Appreciate your time taken with my problems!Have a nice Night/Day!Cheers
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has a boyfriend, never had a girlfriend, she has a boyfriend Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, AngelofLove  +, writes (5 November 2009):
 Dear Hellium
You known deep down in your heart what the answer is. Asking the same question again does not change the answers you already had.
Nobody is here to judge anybody. But the answer is simple
Because she has a boyfriend, you need to leave her alone.
Because she feels her boyfriend is not right for her, she needs to leave him.
Until she does, there isn't a way forward without hurting someone, specially you.
I do not doubt that she is lonely but this does not justify, pretending so one moment that anything healthy could come of it.
You sound like a nice guy, just a bit lonely and confused.
You deserve to have a girlfriend all to yourself. Do not settle for casual encounters.
If this girl is as intelligent as you say she is, she will make the right decision and does not need your shoulder to cry on.
Take care
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