A
female
age
41-50,
*elplessly devoted
writes:I am in my early 30's, single mother of 8 year old son... My son is not with me since I'm working overseas. I've got my boyfriend through net and we have our wonderful relationship for almost 4 months now. We meet once for he visit where I am. Our communication is constant and gradually develops. Without his knowing that I have my son, and I am very much afraid to open this discussion to him... He was also just broke out from a very long relationship of more than 10 years... I have 2 worries which my life confronted as of this moment. How to tell him about my son and the greater possibility that they could be together with his ex-girlfriend... Please, with this confusions... May I humbly seeking your advice.Helplessly devoted
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2009): This is usually something people tell you right away so why would you keep it a secret? He might find that odd but you do need to tell him right away.
A
female
reader, malvern  +, writes (23 June 2009):
 Look you must tell him about your son. Say this " I have something to tell you which up until now I did not think I needed to tell you because our relationship was new and I didn't know we would still be seeing each other for all this time". The longer you leave it the harder it will be and he will feel as though you have deceived him. Don't be surprised if he backs off for a while. If he backs off for good then to be honest it just proves he's not right for you. There is nothing you can do about his ten year relationship. Did he finish it or did she? Either way, you just have to trust him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2009): You want a future with this man, and so you know that you must tell him about your son sooner or later. I'm afraid that you may have done some damage to the relationship already by keeping this very important information from him, but he may understand why you were afraid to tell him. Really, today is the right time to make him a cup of tea, sit down at the table with him and tell each other all your secrets. I know it's difficult, because otherwise you wouldn't be asking for this advice, but in your heart you know that you must do it as soon as possible. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Imayknow1980 +, writes (23 June 2009):
 Hey, Thats great news that you've met someone you get on so well with. I understand your worries about telling him about your son as he has just come out of a long term relationship. Here's how I see it, Your son and you are a package, Your son is always going to be in your life and any man that you get involved with would have to accept that and be happy with you having a son. I would let this man know as soon as possible the longer you keep it from him the harder it will be to tell him and he may feel like you've been living a lie whilst you have been together. He may not respond the way you want or he could be completely fine with it. Either way your son should be your priority in all of this. Best of luck xx
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