A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi, me and my husband have been married a year and we've been together for about 3 on and off and he wants me to talk dirty to him during sex but i always try but i always get this feeling of embarrassment when i try to how do i get over that?and what should i do so that i can.i would really like to please my husband the way he wants. thank you for your replies! Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2008): The transition to using hard-sex words within a
marital situation is not easy. I believe the
man usually takes the first step and is aroused
in using words that the couple avoids in ordinary
discourse. Unless the wife is completely turned off
by such usage, she should indicate by a murmur or the
like that she accepts and approves this initiation.
The man might then ask her to reciprocate. Example:
He whispers, "Oh baby, I've been thinking about
f-ing you all day. Do you want it? Do you want to
f-d?" Her reply, again a whisper, "Hmm, yes, let
me have it. F-k me!" And so forth. So the general
ideas to encourage him to take the lead in his sort
of way and wherein you reciprocate as indicated until
such time as you feel comfortable being the initiator.
At that time, it is YOU will say, for instance, "I've
been so horny all day. I need it. I need you to
put your c-k inside by c-t. F-k me lover!" You will
get a response!
A
male
reader, mff +, writes (26 May 2008):
I would love to get my wife to do this.
I do have an idea, and am going to try it. TELL your mate
(whether you be man or woman) what some "key words"
are that really turn you on. I think we all find a small
handful of words to be really dirty sexy turn-ons. Be honest
with each other. You know in your heart what those words
are. So tell your mate, and then just USE them while
you are having sex.
That might be a really easy way to start out.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2008): i just found out my husband wants me to talk dirty to him, and trust me, is very important to him, as he found a woman who would talk dirty to him, if I don't, don't be embarrassed, I know exactly how you feel, as I am shy also, just don't think about it and do it.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2008): First things first, get comfortable with yourself, and the fact that your husband wants you to this, so theres no need to feel shy about what you might say. Next, set the mood. Make sure theres no distractions. Your man will get turned on by mostly any noises you make, heavy breathing, moans, body language, so start out little by dirty talking with these first, then, at your own pace, just start to say whatever you're thinking. If he's doing a good job, tell him. If you want to be touched here or there, or think he looks sexy, tell him. Just make sure to say it all in a breathey voice. It gets easier every time.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2007): I am a husband of seven years and am always trying to think of new ways to spice things up a bit. Talking dirty has increased the excitement in the bedroom. My wife and I both have grown in this department. As a husband, I can say that it is very arousing. She knows how to say the right things, but it has been a several year long process. I particularly like to hear how she wants or needs me to make love to her. I love to hear her tell me what to do to her or needs done to her. This is a prime time to tell him/her what you wanty them to do to increase your pleasure. Wrok on it, it is worth every word.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2007): you know i feel the same way and i would really like to know what to do
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A
male
reader, sleepyhollow  +, writes (25 May 2007):
I like the suggestion offered by Dagwood.
Do try it. Talking dirty in bed can be particularly expressive and fun once you get into the act. If it helps, tie him up and blindfold him, and then have a little bit of fun.
One of the things I've heard people doing to get over the hump, as it were, is to role play. You pretend to be the temptress or "school marm" and he's the innocent. Use your imagination. Dirty talk doesn't come easy to everybody, and I imagine it probably takes practice.
Good luck.
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A
male
reader, Dagwood  +, writes (25 May 2007):
 Hi Anon. Try standing or kneeling behind him on the bed or use a blindfold. Do this for the first few minutes each time you make love and it should break the ice. Think of things you would really like to do to him and him to you and tell him. Use your imagination, don't be embarrassed he's your husband and you're just having fun. Good luck.
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