A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My bf works awaywe have been together just under a year and have been planning our lives togetherim so in love with him i had a work dinner got very drunk and we went out afteri flirted with another guy which included letting him put his arm around meone of my bf's mates saw me and told himi denied it at first, but evetually i came clean and said i flirtedthere was lots of tears and we said we would try and get over it the next day he then discussed it with his mate and his mate expressed that he had seen me with this guys arm around me and that there had been contact of us leaning on each other his mate had also said he saw a kiss - but there was no kiss - he then brought this up withwe once again had a big massive talk that included tears and yelling, he basically came up with that i lied or didnt divulge all the info i cld of, and that now he cant trust me,then the next day we talked and said we wanted to try and repair it because we love each other, he knows i didnt intentionally mean to hurt him and we are so much in lovehow do i show him that he can trust me so we can rebuild our relationship?I will never do it again because i want no one but him, i was drunk and incredibly stupid i want so much to take it back what ive done, how do i get our relatioship back on track as he will continue to work away so we rely alot on trust
View related questions:
drunk, flirt Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honor  +, writes (14 February 2008):
Firstly if I got this right - what happenned was that you got slightly drunk and perhaps flirted a little and a guy put his arm around you. I mean it is hardly cheating - you didnt kiss him or go back to his place or give him his number etc so in principle you havent done anything so mortally wrong to have both yourself and your boyfriend being so harsh about it.
It sounds like your boyfriend's friend is trying to cause trouble and I have no idea why he would do that. Why would he say that he saw you kissing and make it seem much more than what it was?
But from a trust angle I can understand your boyfriend perhaps thinks that if you would lie about something so little then you may lie about something even bigger. So just give it time - trust takes a lot of time to build. And just spend the next few days together, no arguing or no bringing up that event. Go to the movies, go out to dinner, laugh, whatever. I would also say if his friend is around then be on your best behaviour especially as he seems to have no problems with exaggerating the truth a bit!
Good luck x
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (14 February 2008):
 Time is a great healer. It will take time to gain back his trust.
You know what is right and wrong , so you watch your steps.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2008): Hi Hunny
OH! I really feel for you, I got terribly pissed one night when I was first with my fella and apparently was flirting like mad with some random guy playing pool, I didnt really remember a bloody thing as I fell in the hedge after, They should have left me there as I to got a "TALKING TO" The next morning.
But I saw the hurt in my guys eyes and realised drastic times call for drastic measures 1...Not to drink more than 5 zambukas in one go!!!!! And write him a card of how sorry for hurting his feelings and that I had realised that maybe I should drink less and I loved him so very much and so on... He was ok with that as he realised I didnt have a clue that Id done something that bad, Your b/fs friend is a bit of a tell tail anyway if no kiss happened why tell your fella, Jealousy springs to mind hunny. He has probably made the situation twice as bad as it really was love, I hope the card thing works and you can sort things out, Just reasure him you had to much to drink and now you no your limits and are aware that you wont allow yourself to get into that situation again as it hurts you to see him hurt as you love him so much. TAKE CARE SWEETHEART WITH LOVE N HUGS MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
...............................
A
female
reader, Masami  +, writes (14 February 2008):
 Yea that was pretty bad, from now on i wouldnt think about geting to drunk, from now on when you go out without him, a drink or two is fine but no more if you cant control your feelings. I have that same problem, when i get drunk i flirt around, but the thing is, its not really that bad, its not like you went all the way with someone else, if you didnt even kiss him then you shouldnt have anything to worry about. If his friend is lieing and your guy doesnt believe you then i think you should reconsider who your with. Yes you did try to deny it in the first place but we all make mistakes, if it went any further then it did i can see him geting upset. But it didnt go to far then just a arm around you. Its up to you, hw do you see it. I dont think its that bad because it didnt go to far but everyone sees things different. Good luck.
...............................
|
