A
male
age
36-40,
*venger08
writes:Hey I'm really interested in this girl but I just don't know what to do. She seems really interested. We talk all the time or at least try to. I think she might be involved with some other guy but I'm not sure I was going to ask her more but how can I show her what she's missing and persuade her to come my way? I have talked with people she knows and they have told me that she seems really depressed with this other guy but, well I don't know how to word it so I'll just say nervous to move on and away from this other guy. So anyone got any suggestions on how to persuade her that everything will be ok, and to show her what she's missing out on?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, LovelessAct1  +, writes (14 November 2010):
If she's currently involved, there's not much you can do. You don't want to be "that guy" that convinces girls to break up with their BF's because you're the better catch at the moment. It may sound like a good idea, but they may only come to resent and regret it.
You say she's depressed with her situation with this other guy? Well then let it fall apart on its own. You don't need to influence it. If its a bad relationship, it'll crumble all by itself.
When she is free, however, that's when I'll answer your initial question. All you have to do is be a genuine guy. Listen to her, be willing to talk, and be available. DON'T become a doormat, though! Make sure she can see you are plenty independent and functional on your own and have a lot of other things going on. But still support her in her decisions and start talking to her more. If she starts to like the real you, she'll come to you on her own.
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