A
male
age
30-35,
*ugs
writes:Hello.So I'm 23, and have been wanting a relationship for some time. Thing is it'll never happen if I don't do something about it! Problem is, I live in a semi-rural village on the edge of a small town. How might I go about meeting gay guys / what might I be doing wrong on dating websites? What's some good stuff to get in an online dating profile?ThanksH Reply to this Question
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male
reader, hugs +, writes (5 April 2014):
hugs is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the honest replies, guys :) xx
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2014): I don't think there's anything specific that gets you a man from a profile. Would be down to your chat, I guess but my main thing would be "just be yourself & don't rush in tae things with closed eyes, take time to get use to the idea, find you're self before looking to find someone to invite in to your "world" it's all fine being gay and that but reality is being gay has it's hard times as well as fabulous times. just be yourself and stay true to who you are. Look up where your local LGBT groups are, or gay clubs and summer is coming Gay pride will be on tour all over the UK loads of oppturnitys to meet someone there. Good luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 April 2014): Well, you should be honest without revealing too much personal information. Don't create an image of yourself you can't backup in reality.
It's hit or miss, whether anyone will like you for more than just having sex with you. You can't make people really feel anything by reading your profile, and looking at your profile picture.
You will learn that most gay websites lead mostly to sexual hookups. If they have a good reputation, it will cost money for membership. They will make claims of successful connections; but realistically, you'll spend more time searching than connecting. That's the reality of life, on or offline.
First of all, get that childish idea of instantly finding a relationship out of your skull. You have to develop mutual feelings with another person. He won't look at your online profile, and BANG!!! He's in-love, ready to move into a little cottage, get a cat, and plant roses. You have to come down to earth and out of the clouds, young man. You live in a little village and you obviously don't get out much.
You may not be doing much of anything wrong. Gay men online are superficial and choosey. They want a fantasy-man. Muscular half-naked guys with tattoos get the most attention. If you're average to attractive; but you don't participate in a lot of impressive activities; and show a lot of flash, you may not get a lot of hits on your profile.
Notice all the airbrushed profile pictures, motorcycles, and sailboats? Exotic vacations and pictures with the Eiffel Tower in the background. Photoshopped body-shots? These people have a romanticized notion of love; and are looking for someone to complete a fantasy. You wonder if their that great, why are they on a dating site? They should have found love on those exotic vacations on the Riviera! Truth be-known, they worked and saved for years and skipped rent for a month. Or, jacked-up credit cards.
They will make you spend your life-savings trying to impress them. They will start an online romance, text you, get your attention; then drop you when something better comes along. I've helped so many broken hearts from online disappointments. So set realistic expectations and be willing to be patient. You will get noticed. Even if you're just a cute young ordinary sweet guy from a rural-village on the edge of town.
It will take you longer to find someone who would be interested in a small-town young gay man, who hasn't done much of anything; and pleads for attention in his profile.
Welcome to the real gay-world, my boy.
You'll have to save-up your cash. Get yourself a vehicle, or take a train into town once and awhile. Get a peek at gay-culture through an occasional visit to a club.
Find a friendly face, and chat and find out where people go. Get yourself a job in-town, and get a feeling of living outside your comfort-zone. Explore. Once you are mobile and more accessible, men will find you. You'll meet people face to face, and not have to rely on trolls scrolling through hundreds of desperate pics of lonely superficial gay men.
You have to venture out of your town. Not wait for life to find you. Relationships have to grow. They don't instantly happen the minute you meet someone. You're in for a lot of heart-ache thinking like that.
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