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female
,
anonymous
writes: i am 17 and recently started seeing a boy who is 19. i am open about the fact that i am a virgin and he told me that he has only had sex one time. my friend told me not to believe him since he is 19 and seems to have a party lifestyle. i honestly wouldnt mind how many times he has had sex and it wouldnt change how i feel about him. keep in mind he might be telling me the truth and has only done it one time. he also hasnt yet lied to me. how do i go about making sure hes not just telling me what i want to hear without accusing him of being a liar?
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2006): Just tell him. I would be happier to know the truth as I can better deal with it coming from you then another person. Tell him that you have doubts because of his age and lifestyle.
In the end, you are going to have to chose to be happy with his answer weither it was what you had scripted or if it is the truth.
If you can not trust him now and take what your friends have to say over someone you are chosing to spend apart of your life with...what does this say?
To expect others to upfront and honest with you; you have go to be that back.
Reassure him that it doesn't matter (and it better not...you better be honest to yourself on that one) and that you would appreciate the honest truth.
I think if he does come out with the truth...accept it.
Good Luck Girl.
A
female
reader, kellyO  +, writes (8 August 2006):
 Hi,
I am afraid there isnt any really way to find out how many partners ones boyfriend or girlfriend has, except what the individual says. Even if u really do pressure him to tell you there is always the probablity that he might insincere about it or honestly telling you the truth it all depends on the individual.I really dont think u can conclude whether he has had many partners becos of his party going nature.Besides not all party goers are promiscous some people enjoying going to parties just to have a good time.
Since there is really no way of confirming this try to relax and enjoy your relationship with this guy. You did mention in your posting that it doesnt really matter anyways.Dont allow your friend create doubts in your relationship. I would advise u to limit what u do tell her concerning your affairs with your boyfriend. Try to separate your love lfe with your friendship with her.
I would also like to mention that u should always use protection if u decide to become sexual active much later on, just to be safe.
Take care dearie and goodluck
Kelly.
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