A
female
age
41-50,
*ixieGwen
writes:I've been broken up w/ my bf for 2 wks or so. We broke up cos he was "no longer feeling it" although during are whole relationship up until the end - he called/saw me daily, told me i was better than everyone he's dated/had me meet his family, wanted to keep me.. but at the end he started having financial/work trouble/seemed really bothered by not being able to take me out etc. We both agreed that we didnt wanna see others. He said maybe after gettin his finances together we could date - he still wanted to keep in contact/hang etc.We've be in contact and I told him that I wouldnt assume we're together just cos he contacts me/if we sleep together.We got together to watch a movie and ended up having sex 2x. He seemed a little reserved* like it was our 1st time*/his pupils were huge *he doesnt do drugs and I heard that's a sign the person is aroused/extremely attracted to the other person*. He was a little different cos he kept suckin on my neck, not sure if he was tryin to leave a hickey.. but it was different for him. I also found out works not goin any better. He mentioned he hadnt slept well for 4 days/has been having nightmares and has a shitty couple of weeks and was miserable all weekend (night before we talked on the phone and he implied he's happier). How can you be happy if you dont sleep/have nightmares etc? I'm currently into NY and he messaged me 2 say he hopes I have a nice trip and mentioned he biked 2 work. So I said that I need to get mine fixed/spruced up so I can ride it and he volunteered to look at it/fix it.(I didn't hint). I wanna be there for him and I wish he would talk to me. I miss him a lot.. I want us to get back together soo bad but it seems he's done nothing but push me away ever since he's had financial/work trouble. I dunno what to do. I'm trying to be his friend and more but I don't wanna spook him.How do I reassure him and let him know I'm here for him and possibly get him back?
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female
reader, QuirkLady +, writes (26 July 2009):
 I say let him be for a while. He sounds like he is going through a really stressful time with his money and work problems. Keep in casual, positive contact and don't add to his stress. Hopefully once the storm has passed he will realize what a great and kind girlfriend you are and get back with you, because you supported him and let him lean on you in his time of need. And if not, well, you tried your best.
Good luck.
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