A
female
age
51-59,
*ichards girl
writes:How do I know if my boyfriend that I have been living with for 3 years is still in love with me. he spends a lot of money on his ex and takes care of the house she lives in and is still filing taxes with her but has spent every night with me and is on a lease with me and has me run to the cleaners for him and cleaning and shopping and cooking is all done by me and I pay for it all. All he pays for is the cable, bottled water and rent I pay for all the shopping and gas to get the things he wants he also wants dinner every night at 7 pm and gets upset if he didn't have lunch he works 7 days a week and says that I need to make more money to live I make about 22,000 a year and a good part of that is spent to satisfy his wants he says it's more important to eat good home cooked food not store bought or caned or frozen. He pays his ex 2,000 a month and also whatever she needs this is the best part of all she makes over 60,000 a year and works for the state and he owns a business making over 200,000 a year and is a partnership with another business but continues to talk about us like we are to be together for a long time. he always wants me here but wants me to take care of myself. he doesn't spend time with her but he always has a friend at her house fixing or painting or any odd thing she might need help with. I told him that he might not live there any more but it's like he never left she has packed up 12 boxes of his things 6 just in the last 2 months and 6 about a year ago I ask him all the time is he with me and he says that he is here every night and that should tell me something. I also rub his pains away I serve him his meals and if he needs a drink O get it for him. I just want a man to love me and be my husband not someone else's and live with me and have me take care of him and his needs and he takes care of her and her needs is it all for tax reasons he has gold credit and I don't is that what love is about? he says he loves my and wants me but he still is listed as living with her and filing taxes with her is it her job that has the medical the reason he stays on paper with her.
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his ex, money, trapped Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2008): In reply to your question....... How do I know he loves me?The answer is simple... he doesn't. I know that sounds harsh but if isn't pursueing you and making an effort he just isn't that into you. Have you ever read that book? Women have all kinds of excuses why the men they love do the silly things they do but the truth is that men are cowards. Men will never tell you the truth about there true feelings( if there aren't good) because they want to hold on to you until the one they are really waiting for shows up. You man is just useing you. If i had to give you advice i would say.... kick his ass to the curb and find someone that will respect and appreciate you for who you really are. Don't be afraid because there is always someone else out there for you.
A
female
reader, richards girl +, writes (13 November 2008):
richards girl is verified as being by the original poster of the questionno they do not have any children together and at the time we met he said that they were separated. I my self was also separated from my husband. So story short I'm divorced now and my ex is married to a new person and my boy friend is still married and now I feel like I'm trapped for I walked away from every thing so that my kids wouldn't hurt but yes they are both grown now but thats really not a issue. I just want what I thought was a man that said he wanted me and needs me and said that he can't live without me. I told my boy friend when we met that we should just date but he said he didn't want that he wanted to be together. I guess I didn't really ask him what he really meant by that? So now I have lost everything and he gets everything. thats not right
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2008): You don't mention whether he has children with her, in which case the money would be to keep them.
If they have no children, and you are not happy with how things are, you need to talk to him about how you feel about the situation. Otherwise you are paying money you would rather not, and indirectly financing her.
It sounds like you are not happy and want more commitment from him. If he won't give this then in the long run you would be better off without him.
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