A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:My husband and I have been together for over 10 years. He takes alot of meds that makes having sex difficult. Recenty he said he's bored with the relationship. How do I spice things up and keep him interested without sex being able to be a factor. All the advice columns center around sex. I love him very much, and I love to have sex with him. I just can't initiate it because if it turns out that he can't, he feels humiliated. He doesn't even like to get snuggly because he thinks I will want to have sex.Any advice would be appreciated. I really don't want to lose him. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2008): Whenever I hear a woman saying she wants to "spice things up" it makes her sound so boring esp sexually. So first thing is stop using that phrase. Sexy women never say that.
A
female
reader, TELLULAH  +, writes (20 March 2008):
 You are a very understanding lady, that I dont think is being appreciated. Whilst you obviously love him, he needs to put a bit of an effort in as well.
It must be extremely hard, to live like that. But I wonder if you ignored him just a little, if it would bring back his desire to show some affection to you. After all its true what they say, if champagne came out of a tap, would we all want to drink it so much. What I am trying to say is that he has you on tap, but if you didnt jump through hoops to try and get him to notice you, maybe he would see how much he loves and needs you.
You say he is on medication, maybe you could go to the doctors together and see if they could help you.
Good luck
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2008): Not sure of the picture or setting of both your situation, but is he able to do physical things? Like ride a horse, go for walks, see a movie, see a band play; bowling; golf?
For sex, again I do not know his condition, but as a man, I know my fears. If you can let him know that you don't expect him to do anything, but instead, you just want to play with him (body and body parts), to tell him to relax and don't left a finger, that all you want is for him to relax so that you can get pleasure in touching him and playing with his penis, you might get at least some of what you need.
At times I wish I could read peoples mind, but I'd hate to hear his mind chatter just knowing my own mind chatter.
I'd love to have sex, but I no longer trust my wife. If this is what he feels about you, then you really have your work cut out, but it means trust issues, soulmate issues, walking on eggs, jitters from not knowing what will happen next (jykle and hyde syndrome) or something like that.
...............................
|
