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female
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anonymous
writes: My boyfriend is ten years older than me and is very loving. However whenever we go out with a group of his friends there is one girl (22) who is very pretty and he always dances with her and seeks her attention. It is obvious that she is charmed by this and he continues to make suggestive jokes, dance with and hug her despite me already saying I'm not happy about it. The girl is also extremely friendly towards me and asks me if we're happy together but I feel like she's being fake and she is probing for information. When I bring it up with him he gets very defensive and makes out like I am making a big deal out of nothing. Am I? I don't know what to do and how to handle it. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Delila +, writes (20 September 2005):
Hi,
I always say a woman needs to trust her intuition, it could be that you are jealous of this girl and maybe you would admit to being a bit jealous. However I don't think this is the underlying problem here. I would not be happy if I was out with my man and he was giving another woman attention. Suggestive Jokes would be out of the question, and hugging her well I think he would be going home with her and not me. You have already told him that you don't feel comfortable with his behaviour and he continues to do it, on this note alone you need to wonder why you are with a man who does not take your feelings into account. Ultimatums rarely work and would probably be a waste of time. You have already told him how you feel and he has completly invalidated and minimised your feelings by telling you you are making a big deal out of nothing. Truth be told this guy does not sound like he is worth the effort. Be good to yourself and find someone who respects and loves you, let her have him and good luck to her.
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