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age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: There's this guy at work who's pretty creepy and pervy. He's 32 and whenever a new, young girl starts here he immediately tries to get her number and says disgusting things about her. I've been working there for 4 years and for all that time he's been after me.I finish my shift a 4pm and try to leave a few minutes earlier because if I don't he literally runs up the road to catch up with me. He's given me his number 3 times when I didn't want it and I've never called or text him. 3 days ago I was on my break and he came in the staff room. He asked for my number and usually I'd lie and say I didn't have my phone on me but I was texting at the time so I couldn't lie. I ended up giving him number because I couldn't think of a way to get out of it. Ever since then he's been texting me 10 times a day. He texts me at 12 o'clock at night sometimes. I try and ignore most of them. He keeps telling me he loves me and that I looked good at work that day etc I lied and told him I had a boyfriend. He got really angry and said he'd beat him up if he hurt me. It's getting too much now and there's only so many times you can ignore your phone going off. I've told him I don't see him in that way but he just doesn't give up.He text me last night saying he wishes he was dead and that he'll always be there for me till he dies. I told him that we can be work friends bur that's it and that if he's depressed I can't help him. I just want him to leave me alone. I don't want to be "friends" with him at work but I think he's unstable and I don't want to be responsible for him hurting himself or something. He said it's my fault he's depressed. He said he's jealous that I have a boyfriend.What do I do?
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at work, depressed, jealous, text Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Andy00  +, writes (4 June 2011):
 Excellent! Be sure to keep us posted
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI still have all the messages saved on my phone just in case.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI sent him a text message telling him to leave me alone or i'll report him. Seems to have done the trick so far :)
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A
male
reader, Andy00 +, writes (2 June 2011):
I agree with GeeGee, it's time to talk to the boss. The guy is harassing you and it needs to stop. Saying things like he's going to beat up your boyfriend if he hurts you and that he'll always be there for you until he DIES is completely inappropriate. Talk to your superior as soon as possible!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2011): Yes you definitely need to speak to your manager, tell him/her what's been going on exactly as you have written it here, say that its making you feel very uncomfortable, and getting you down. They should address this straight away.
If he still continues to hound you, you need to report it to the police so that they can handle it.
Never worry about his threats to hurt himself!!!!
You should not feel the need to be nice to someone who is making you feel sorry for him!!!!!
You need to do this first thing in the morning.
Good luck sweetheart
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2011): You should have been straight with him at the start, instead of saying you didnt have your phone on you. When he gave you his number you should have been honest with him at that point.
Now you need to firmly tell him that you want to be left alone, you feel like he is suffocating you and you need space. Tell him if he doesnt leave you alone you will go further about it.
Then don't answer calls, don't look at him, avoid speaking to him. If he continues to harrass you then go to your boss say the guy is stalking your phone, and harassing you and that its making your working environment intolerable.
If nothing is done on that level then you need to go to the police. Don't lead him on in anyway and don't try to be nice and polite. This guy could get dangereous thats why its always best to put them straight at the very begining if you are not interested.
Be careful and Good Luck.x
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A
female
reader, RedAthena  +, writes (1 June 2011):
 I would speak immediately with your Supervisior/Manager and tell them you are being harrassed. Find out from the local police department what you can do as well. (He may be breaking the law.)
Call your phone service provider and get a new number.
(You messed up on that one dear. It is ok to say NO.)
You do not need to lie. Lies tend to catch up with you later! You can be kind and direct and tell someone. "Sorry, but I am not interested."
You might have just let this get too far out of hand. Do you have anti harrassment laws in your country/city? In some areas, if you tell your Supervisior and they do not discipline/put a stop to it, they can be sued for permitting a hostile work environment.
If this man is mentally unstable, you do not want to become a victim if he lashes out at you for rejecting him. If you have security at your work, see if you can request an escort to your car or always walk with OTHER work freinds.
Arrange with a freind to meet you after work at random times.
If the man keeps approaching you, in front of witnesses that you are not able to talk to him and he needs to stop harrassing you.
Do NOT be caught alone in a situation with this man and document every contact, time, date, what was said, where it was said, and any witnesses that were around.
Best Wishes.
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A
female
reader, GeeGee255 +, writes (1 June 2011):
 I think it is time to speak to a manager at work about this guy. Let them handle him.
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