A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:there is this girl that i like and i am planning on asking her to be my girlfriend. the problem is that she has had really abusive boyfriends and can no longer trust boys as she used to. is there any way that i can convice her that i am a good guy and do not want to harm her? btw i would never abuse a girl Reply to this Question
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male
reader, kenny  +, writes (1 April 2007):
 Ok so has had a couple of abusive partners in the past, so naturally she is going to be wary of future relationships. It may take time, but all you can do is gradually build her confidence up in you bit by bit. Show her you are a nice guy, that you would never contemplate abusing her like her previous partners did. Be considerate, loving, and im sure she will put her trust in you in no time atal.
hope it goes well, and good luck.
A
female
reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx +, writes (1 April 2007):
 You sound really nice and she is lucky to have someone like you interested in her. It is hard to change someones view of people once they've been wronged, especially if it's gone on for a long time, but it can be done. We're never the same once someone has abused us in any way but we can be built back up to a happy, stable person with the support and help of those who love us. You have to be that guy and, over time, she will come to see you are different.
Take things slow: she won't be used to a guy who is in touch with what she wants emotionally. Talk a lot and don't pressure anything else, physically I mean. She will slowly open up and trust you, she's only young, this can be turned around. Just make sure you're really up for this challenge as, break her heart again, and she may not come back from the hurt this time.
I know you can do this if you really want her to be happy and to make a difference with her. Stick with it and be patient, it'll be worth it in the end.
Good luck, she's a lucky girl.
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