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male
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*nelson292
writes: A few years ago while I was at college I met a girl who I became friends with. But after a while I went on to develop very strong feelings for her. The sort of feelings where you lay awake at night obsessing over someone. I ended up doing a lot worse than I could have done in my exams due to distraction. I never acted on my feelings because she was involved with someone and she never showed any interest in me. After a while they began to fade away and I came to value my friendship with her. After she left for university we lost touch and I began dating other women. However, a few months ago we re-established contact by email and agreed to meet up. The instant I saw her the whole thing just came flooding back! I've been depressed the past couple of weeks, constantly thinking about her. The strange thing is I really don't know why I feel this way for her. I just know we wouldn't make a good couple. We're good friends and have soom things in common but not enough for a lasting relationship. I wouldn't want to throw our friendship away on something I'm pretty sure wouldn't work. I'm trying to redirect my feelings towards another by dating other women but it just won't work! As strange as it may seem, what I want is to fall out of love with her whilst preserving the friendship. Any advice you could give would be very much appreciated! Thanks!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Jadzia1127  +, writes (21 July 2006):
 No couple has everything in common, it would be boring and frighteningly disturbing.
I wonder why you think you would not make it as a couple how different can you be?
I personally know a beauty queen that married a computer geek and they are as happy as happy can be. I know a trekkie (a sci-fi junkie) that married a leader in the business world and they had lots of kids and are still in love. I have seen a county bumpkin marry a city girl and happily move to the suburbs, three kids ago. My own sister top in her law class married a weird Gothic guy that loves the ground she walks on and she loves him.
How different can you be to this woman that you wouldn't want to see why you have these sparks flying?
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