A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am a 25 year old female. I have only been with my boyfriend for almost two years.We have three children all together in our home. I have a 4 yr old son from a previous relationship, he has a 2 1/2 yr. old son from a previous relationship and we have a 5 month old lil girl together. I have had all my kids by a c-section because when I was 16 I had to have an emergency c-section for my daughter who was too premature to make it. Ever since I can remember the guys that I have been intimate with have always said that I feel different than other girls. Meaning my insides change and sometimes they have said it feels like they are hitting something. My boyfriend now for past couple of months keeps acquising me of being with someone else because I feel different. I tried explaining to him that I'm not like other girls and that he's not the first person to say that and he still insists that I'm cheating. It's hard to have someone doubting you when you know that you have been nothing but faithful to him. Especially when Im always at home taking care of our kids, because we always have all three of them. Ido everything to make sure our home and kids are maintained and still get accused of being unfaithful when I don't even go anywhere. He constantly thinks that I'm not being faithful but I am and it makes me feel that he is not if he is still persistant with it. How can I make him understand???? I have never pushed a child out, my insides have been pulled out and put back in soo many times that I believe it is possible for things to be different and he doesn't think that. Am I right OR is he???? If we are having this much difficulty now, how will we last the rest of our lives. I Love him and our family so much, I dont want to lose it. I know no one has ever said it was easy to build a relationship but when you cant come to an understanding on something like proving you are faithful what can we do???? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2009): You have done nothing wrong. I suggest that you give your boyfriend some information on C-Sections from the internet so he can understand that sometimes women who have had them do feel different sexually sometimes (I have had 2 & my husband told me I felt different also). However, it's clear that he has a trust issue that he needs to solve, there is no reason for you to feel bad because of his insecurities. And there is no real relationship without trust! Talk to your man a few more times about this issue, and if he still continues to accuse you...then you need to leave regardless of how many kids you have, you shouldn't have to live with constant false accusations & false guilt for no reason! You can do better! But I do hope all works out for you!
A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE +, writes (20 July 2009):
 Theres something else your husband is accusing you of this alleged infidelity as a way of expressing his discontent with something basically hes starting a fight hes unhappy and by accusing you of cheating he solidifies his belief that its your fault. Honestly i dont see how he can rationally honestly believe that a woman with three kids specially that young has time and opportunity to hve an affair. Speak with a doctor maybe you can get evidence to that supports your theory on something being diffrent in you plus it could be medical problem. any way good luck hope things work out for you
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