A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've Been with my boyfriend for 7 years this year and always thought I'd spend the rest of my life with him. He's the only person I've ever slept with and considered him my soulmate . Btw were both gay males. He has had numerous girlfriends before me as he's a couple of years older, however he was always cheated on him all. He was still with his ex when we got together 7years ago. For this reason at the beginning I always expected him to cheat on me too. It took me a while to open up to him but 6 years everything was perfect. We have been to many places around the world together and spent most of our time together as we also work together. However 12 months ago things started to change. Jokes stopped becoming funny, tempers were shorter. It just wasn't fun anymore. Shifts at work got changed and we no longer worked same days, it was meant to be temporary and I didn't mind. I missed him at work, but as time went on I started to realise that I preferred he shift change as I was grateful of some time away from my partner. I still believe that he adores me but I can't bear spending time alone with him. So for months I thought about ending it all but never knew how or what to say, he lives with me and my family, he works with me and he's the only person I'd ever known. Then I started talking to another colleague. It was harmless fun at first. It was nice hearing someone say nice things to me, laughing again. Then random chat turned into flirting. And I found myself texting the other person constantly sometimes till5am . I think I began falling in love with someone else, but as far as I knew he was straight. After a few months of talking I started going around to his house while my partner was at work. Nothing ever happened. We would eat food and watch movies. Then 1 night we kissed. I've been going to his and kissing and cuddling for weeks now, we still haven't had sex. We've been talking for 8 months now gradually getting closer. He's admitted to me he's gay too, and we've admitted we love each other. I've never felt like this for current partner and it hurts me to come home to my partner and leave the other person, all I want to do is see him not my partner. I just don't know how to approach breaking up with my partner, I know 100% what I've done makes me a bad person, but we drifted apart and along came someone who took me off my feet, my partner isn't the easiest person in the world. He's always miserable. Always snaps. He's always been that way, just never with me.. Until a couple of years ago. And I can't take it anymore. I try to ask him why but he says there isn't a reason. Like I said I live with him and work with both people. I know who I want to be with. But have no idea how to approach the situation ..
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 June 2015): I was in a relationship for almost 7 years when I finally left my bf. It was difficult to leave because "I was the only one he had"... and it dragged on. Then I met someone. Every time I would sit my bf down to have a talk, he would sabotage me. In retrospect, I think he was giving me a signal that he didn't want to know. When I told him that me falling for someone else was just a symptom of hod dead we are as a couple, even worse mismatched, he didn't want to hear it. He saw me loving someone else as a possibility to work things out (and I know how weird this sounds). He thought that ih he did better, we'd work out... It took all teh energy and courage I had to help him face the facts.I have never regretted it. My next relationship didn't last long but it was beautiful and we parted as friends. Sometimes I have nightmares that I never left my bf... I felt so stuck. HE was stuck too, he just didn't want to see it.Talk to him. The sooner the better.
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