A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Ive got a guy friend who at times i suspected of being a player. He is a nice guy, big time flirt, real charmer. when we first met, I fell totally in love with him, and told him. he never said he didn't feel the same way, but after I spilled my guts he treated me kindly and made an effort to hang out more. we fooled around once, last month, but that was it, no awkwardness, and it was kinda like it never happened. I was with him today, while he was on break at work, he received a call, from a girl (i never met her) he used to work with. i wanted to leave the room so he could converse in peace. he grabbed my hand and shook his head, mouthed the words "don't go" so i hung out...and listened in, but i didn't want to!the gist of the conversation went this way...she was calling to gossip about an old manager, it was a cheery convo. my buddy asked when could he come into her shop and get a another discount, she replied by asking when will he (my friend)take her out to dinner. he said he was really busy at work, but never said when he would take her. the conversation lasted about 15 mins. It was a bit awkward for me and i tried walking away but he held on or blocked door. afterwards i blew up at him.i accused him of leading her on, and he should take her out. he kept saying no way, she's ugly and in an unhappy marriage and that he's nice to her cos she gives him employee discounts. i got angrier. and i said, he is a selfish friend, because he takes and takes from others but never gives back. he denied my accusations and said he hardly ever talks to her, then accused me of being jealous and he tried numerous times to kiss and hug me, but i just stood there kinda numb..until i could make a break for the door and i took off.the thing is, i became upset, because sometimes i give (one example) him free movie passes that my job gives to me. he says thanks so much, and with kisses and a hug. he has NEVER asked me out, i gave up waiting for that. he then said our friendship was different and that he loves me, but quickly added like a friend, because i'm sure i looked surprised. but i kept thinking what if sometimes i'm the girl on the other end of the line and he's chatting away with me, and not meaning anything he says because he only wants something from me? he swears our friendship is different, but i don't know if i want to be his friend anymore....we work in the same place and i need help figuring out how to ease him out of my life. but we work together and we have lots of mutual friends and my Mom ADORES him...
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female
reader, Helper411 +, writes (10 June 2010):
im sorry to hear bout your trouble. I went out with this guy. he used me kinda like u. only um he tried to have sex with me at school. I told him if he wants to get laid so bad he should crawl up a chickens butt and wait. ut thats not the point. WHat i did to get him out of my life was tell him that he shouldnt treat him like that. and ask him if he does this with all hs past g/f's. the guys i went out with said yes i asked y he said because he said hes a guy and he can do that... boy did i tell him. what im trying to say is, dont be afraid to step up to the plate and tell him what u think. dont shoutor yell or make him feel uncomfy just talk.
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