A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I really need advice. I broke up with my lesbian partner of 3yrs in February. We were having issues and she couldn't forgive me n move past it so we broke up. A couple weeks later I'm in another relationship with a woman I met online. I didn't fall for her fast we just clicked so well that trusting her was easy. Of course I stayed in contact with my ex and glad I did bc the girl I was seeing ended up being a real criminal. I had to involve the police to get her to leave me alone. N of course I told my other ex all about it. I never completely stopped seeing her, in fact I was having sex with her the entire time I moved on and was in my troubled relationship that took the police to resolve. Now again she wants to sex. I looked online and noticed she had a dating profile, the profile is not new. I'm wondering why would she have a dating profile, if shed trying to rekindle our spark. I still love her and I can't be fwb which she already knows. She's been asking me to come over her house but I've been trying to define what are we. What should I do, bc I do miss her and want her? But I also want more than sex? I'm so confused and sad.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2013): Hmmm this sounds a lot like what happened to me and my ex. We dated for a year, and when we broke up, I was SO sad and missed him so much. He missed me too, and so we kept hanging out, which sometimes lead to making out, etc. This went on for 6 months before we went no contact so we could finally get over each other. I don't think there's any way not to be sad--I cried myself to sleep every day for the first month. I think that's just how it goes. But it has been a couple months since we stopped talking, and I am beginning to feel better. I think you and your ex need to stop talking--it will be impossible for you to move on if you don't. Maybe after a while (like, at least a year) you two can be friends. Hope this helps!
A
female
reader, angel91 +, writes (19 July 2013):
If you were having sex the entire time you had broken up, and she was on dating websites looking elsewhere, you were being FWB.
She wants to continue on what you had with no strings. If you can't handle this, tell her where you stand and that if she wants that you need a relationship. Then take some time out to concentrate on yourself
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