A
female
age
41-50,
*haoscutiek
writes:My boyfriend hasn't been able to see his kids for three months now. His ex wife has done so much much mental damage to him to where he believes he is a terrible person, bad father and he is worthless. He has recently pushed me away, he won't hug me, kiss me, say I love you anymore. It hurts me so bad inside. I love him so much, I am willing to put myself through heart ache for him. Also, lately, he just started ignoring me, sleeping in bed all day, he also told me I would be better off without him, and have a nice life. Only negative thoughts come out of his mouth. He has fallen into such deep depression, it feels it has put a damper on our relationship. I just keep going, saying, I am here for you, I love you and we will get through this. It feels like he doesn't care about me anymore. But, everyone around me says he does, its just his depression talking, he feels no hope of seeing his kids. I have asked him if he still loves me, he says I don't know or I can't answer that right now. His sister said I make him the happiest she has ever seen him, begs me not to give up on him. I am not sure how to handle all of this, I am a big mess. What is a girl to do in this kind of situation? Everyone just keeps telling me its his depression talking. To me I feel like he doesn't care for me anymore. How do I deal with all these mixed emotions?
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depressed, ex-wife, his ex, I love you Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, chaoscutiek +, writes (30 May 2012):
chaoscutiek is verified as being by the original poster of the questionIt comes to find out that my boyfriend was cheating on me this whole time. I was not a happy women. I happy to say I am no longer with him.
A
female
reader, chaoscutiek +, writes (15 April 2012):
chaoscutiek is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes he is getting council. I am going to his appointments with him. His medication is starting to help him slowly. His sister said I make him the happiest I've ever seen him. He is just so down about not being able to see his kids. I am a strong women, I have lots of support. Thank you for your advice everyone.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2012): Staying with someone like this will drain you emotionaly move on
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A
female
reader, Foot-In-My-Mouth  +, writes (15 April 2012):
 Make him see a psychiatrist. I suffered from MDD (major depressive disorder) for donkey's years and after lots of medication and counselling, I'm much better now. His symptoms remind me of my own. I tend to think he's either got dysthymia or MDD. So get him professional help before he turns suicidal.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2012): When a man says you will be happier with out me, then he is trying to get you to break up with him. He can't tell you he loves you?! After all you do?? Okay I understand depression but it sounds like this man just wants to be single again! YOU need to give him space. Just leave an don't come back An one day he will come around! But there is a man out there wanting to love you an give you all his loving! I say move on. How long have you been with this man???
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A
male
reader, Daniel the love doctor +, writes (15 April 2012):
 Well I believe he still cares about you... he's just mentally in a messed up space. You have done a lot- and quite frankly it's what I would've recommended that you do on your part by expressing how you're there for him. But unfortunately it's not too much else that you can do. This is something that he would have to work through himself. What would be HIGHLY encouraged for him is counseling, and getting support from more people- perhaps some family/friends. If not, then you're going to have to be his support system. He needs to see a light at the end of the tunnel. But until he does, he's going to be stuck in a rut.
I wish you both the best in this situation.
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