A
male
age
36-40,
*allbusting26
writes:I've been dating a girl, that I love, for about six months. I also love ballbusting, and the problem is that she doesn't want to do it anymore.If you don't know what it is, just Google it. One session usually lasts about 30-60 minutes, depending how hard the kicks/punches are. :DIs there any way I can change her mind? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (30 November 2016):
 Funny. From the start she probably hated it and only did it to please you. Find a common thing with sex and if she says no dont beg.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (29 November 2016):
 If she does not want to do this then you have to respect her wishes. Would you like it if she tried to get you to do something that you really did not want to do? Think off something sexual that is a no for you, now ask yourself is it fair to ask that from her?
I understand that you love her, therefore you need to ask yourself what is more important to you, her love or your fetish? If she is not enough then you might need to figure that out now sooner rather than later.
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A
female
reader, like I see it  +, writes (27 November 2016):
 The short answer is you don't, not if she doesn't want to. I am happy to suggest ways that you two might work around this, but I'm not (and likely no one here is) going to suggest that your girlfriend be pressured into an activity against her wishes - especially one she has been open-minded enough to TRY already before refusing.
That said, there are some possibilities for a compromise of sorts, depending on the reasons she no longer wants to participate in this with you.
If she simply doesn't like it, finds it degrading and doesn't want any part of it, you're out of luck and you need to look for a different girlfriend if this specific act is something you just can't be happy without and no alternative will suffice. (Although I must say, expand your perspective a bit and her denial/withholding of something that you desperately desire isn't that far out of line with other femdom activities, and doesn't necessarily have to ruin this fantasy you have of wanting to be at her mercy.)
If, however, your girlfriend has become worried about hurting you, or about damaging your reproductive potential like WiseOwl suggested, and that is the reason for her reluctance, get creative. Why not see if she's willing to put on fancy high heels and sexy thigh-high stockings and kick or crush an anatomically realistic dildo (or even suggestively shaped fruits/vegetables) right in front of you as part of foreplay? She can add a further element of domination and control by denying you permission to touch yourself while you're watching, by giving you permission to touch yourself but denying you permission to climax, or by verbally insulting your manhood if you're into that and she doesn't mind doing it.
If you haven't already, you might also try experimenting with other forms of domination (by her) and submission (by you) to see if being humiliated or controlled in other ways satisfies some of the same desires as the ballbusting. (Assuming, of course, that she's willing to try them.) There may well be an alternative that lets you feel some or all of what ballbusting does without causing a negative or uncomfortable reaction from your girlfriend. What exactly do you crave about ballbusting? I don't mean the act itself; I mean what you like about how it makes you feel. Identifying that is a good first step to exploring other means of capturing the same, or a similar, feeling.
If at the end of all this you find yourself nonetheless in search of a new partner, you may wish in future to start with dating sites, groups or meetups that center on this particular fetish (ideally) or at the very least on BDSM relationships in general. The odds of the girl on the street who catches your eye just happening to be into ballbusting of her own free will aren't so great, as you have discovered. If this is a dealbreaker for you, you *have* to treat it like one during the "getting to know you" process or you'll be wasting a lot of your own time and emotions (and others' too).
I hope this helps you. Good luck and best wishes!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2016): You know fetishes are not for the faint of heart. Not every guy wants his balls bashed, dude. I think she would be justified in looking at you sideways for asking her to be violent rather than tender to your genitals.
If you know she has conservative values and not given to your taste in sexual pleasure, tread very carefully.
If you plan to have children in your future, or she does; you are taking a huge risk. You are running a risk of testicular cancer by bruising and traumatizing the delicate tissues of your testicles. It's surely a pleasure you could learn to live without, and it may be best in avoiding a shock to your girlfriend for asking. Piss her off enough, you may never have to!
You sure you want to give her such permission? It would be the perfect way to get back at you, and just say it was done with love. It has only been six months. It might scare her off, my friend.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts  +, writes (27 November 2016):
 To each their own, but physically beating up my boyfriend would be a massive no go for me (and him), so I completely understand why most people wouldn't do it.
If you really "need" this fetish satisfied, you need to deliberately find a girlfriend who wants a boyfriend she can attack. BDSM dating sites may be the best place to find a girlfriend because you're not likely to stumble across one who is happy to hurt you like that.
I mean, if you can do without this, let it go and stay with her. Don't try to change her mind; she won't suddenly like kicking/hitting you.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (27 November 2016):
 If she's tried it and finds it distasteful then there's not much you can do to change her mind.
Flip it this way: how could she change your mind to not have this fetish?
You probably need to search for a woman who is into BDSM, which is the arena your particular fetish appears to fit into.
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