A
age
30-35,
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writes: hello, i am a 14 year old and am in love with a 15 year old boy ...but the prpblem is that as am very friendly with most of the guys, and he doesn't like it. i just don't know how to make him understand as am quite open minded and don't mind him speaking or being with girls but if i say so he feels that i don't love him and don't care for him !my friends support his thought and say that whatever he says i should agree but i don't feel that love is all about just being possesive about your partner.because of him i even had to stop my conversation with so many close pals of mine but now i find it difficult to keep away from them,and i don't even want to do anything behind my boyfriend's back as later hemay feel that i've cheated on him.what do i do ? now a days my friends also say that i should leave as he is a part of a bad friend circle.... what do i do ? please advice. Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, PsyCookie +, writes (16 August 2008):
Your boyfriend is either really insecure or he's just a jerk.
Your friends are wrong. He has no right to tell you who to talk to and be a hypocrite with his own words (since he talks to other girls). A relationship is about compromise, trust, communication, and love.
Now, what you could try to do is have a talk with him. Pick a place where you could talk semi-privately. Do it face to face. In your talk, tell him what you just told us here. Tell him that what he's doing is affecting you greatly and that you're having second thoughts about the relationship and that if he doesn't change that you will probably end it. When you talk to him, look at him at the eyes and sound serious. It would be good to write what you're going to say before hand so you know what your objectives are. If he starts crying or yelling, don't panic and maintain your composure. Those are machanisms that people take to make others fear/take pity on them. Don't fall for it.
Please don't be afraid of saying this words, because you have to! This is affecting you a lot and you have to tell him so. Tell him that you want your relationship to work out, so if he still wants to be with you that he needs to change.
Now, just because he is in the bad boys group doesn't mean he will be a bad boy too. But this is your decision to take. If you think that he hasn't changed or that he is being too much of a jerk, then dump him, it will NOT be worth to stay with him.
Good luck and I hope you come with an understanding with your guy.
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