A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Dear agony auntsThis is part 2 of a question i have asked here before I hooked up with this guy like 2 weeks ago and suddenly while having sex i stopped midway and left, i messaged him and clarified went wrong and he only gave me an okay, he hasn't messaged me at all in these two weeks but tonight he messaged and said hi and asked how things are going.The thing is i think i am in love with him really bad , i have known him for 6 months now, but i feel i am not his type, he is a really handsome guy that is always surrounded by hot women and i am just average, i honestly have tried talking with him before about things that matter, i tried having an intellectual conversation but he always ends up sexting it up that i feel at some point the way i joke with him has led plainly led him to the idea that i am nth but a sexual boredom killer. I am a confident person but i still get hurt when i feel i am not enough for someone so my question is how do i try to take things to the next stage with him without getting hurt if he doesn't find me good enough ? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (26 September 2016):
 It sounds to me like he wants sex from you, he was probably taking a back when you up and left, however if he cared for you he would have made sure you where okay. Instead he has ignored you until now and is starting small talk so he can start getting sexual with you again, it sounds like he is doing it out of boredom.
Sweetie you need to up your confidence and self esteem, you should not have sex with anyone until you are ready or until you are in a loving relationship with someone that actually cares about you and how you feel. He is not interested in getting to know you as a person he is wanting a bit of fun. Block his number, you can do much better. Your answer is you cannot take things to the next stage without getting hurt, because you have feelings and he doesn't.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 September 2016): HiHe must have been a bit surprised when you left in the middle of sex, but the fact that he didn't care enough about you to at least text and ask if you're ok, tells me that he isn't into the idea of a relationship. In it's darkest light, you were sex for the night and it didn't work out and he didn't seem that bothered. By the fact that you left or the fact that he had no idea if you were ok or not. Also the fact that every time you two have a 'conversation' by text, he turns it into sexting, also tells me that he is interested in you sexually and nothing more. He has had no contact with you for a couple of weeks and has possibly only got in touch today cos he's horny and he thinks you might put out. I'm sorry if this sounds harsh, but to a bystander (me), this is all I can see from him. He offers no friendship, no care and concern, only sex. Is this what you want? If you are going to get hurt by him making you feel you are not good enough then I would say stay well away because I think he has already shown you that he isn't interested in you in any other way apart from sex. Otherwise why would you be thinking this way? If he made you feel wanted and important to him, you wouldn't be wondering about being good enough at all. My advice is to scrap this one, unless you want to be a notch on his bedpost. My advice is, when you meet someone you think you may be attracted to and vice versa, PLAY it SLOWLY. Don't jump into bed. Men tend to prize what is most difficult to get. They chase a challenge. By giving him sex so quickly, you lost all allure and he now gets in touch when he wants some and has got nothing else going on, cos he thinks you're a sure bet. Prize yourself more highly than that and then future partners will as well. Then there will be no more worrying whether you are good enough or not. Because both him and you will know that you are. Good luck x
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