A
female
age
26-29,
*roken-heartedgirl
writes:I just got out of a relationship with a boy i really loved and i still do..we tell each other we love each other every night..the thing is he has a girlfriend but i made a promised him i wouldnt go with anyone else if we break up..and he told me..when we were together..that he was over her..but this is his ex he is back with..and lately ive been depressed every time i see him or think about him and i think about him a lot..what should i do?I really really love this boy and he loves me well thats at least what he says..but how can you trust a boy that broke yhur heart?but i have been reallyu depressed and sad lately and im forcing my regular self to show so no one knows whats going down;.i guess my question is how do i overcpme this saddness?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (15 May 2010):
 You can overcome the sadness by regaining control of the situation and reasoning things out. Actions speak louder than words - he is with another girl and if he wanted to he could ditch her and date you instead. I am sorry to say it sounds like you are 'back up' girl for him in case things don't work out with his current girlfriend. Your sadness stems from a longing for a relationship and a boy you cannot have. It is ok to be sad about the way things turned out, it is not ok to carry on accepting the situation as it is. Basically you can help yourself by not talking to him for a while as it seems that you when you speak with him it fills you with false hope that the love is still there. Secondly you have to put your own interests before his. To date effectively you have to like yourself enough not to settle for bad behaviour from other people. I am not saying he has behaved that badly but he shouldn't be telling you that he has feelings for you when he is dating another girl. Leave him alone for a bit and keep busy.
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