A
female
age
30-35,
*ightness;
writes:I was 14 when it happened, most people don't believe me, not even my friends.I snuck out of the house to go meet 2 of my girlfriends and two of their guy friends. I had 7 shots, not that many but I passed out in the next 5 mintues. I keep waking up diffrent places, I was on the couch, in the shower, on the floor. I hear these whispers in my ear asking me questions but all I hear is mumbling, and me responding mhm, yes.I'm not too sure what was going on, but I felt him go in me.I woke up in the shower, not sure how long I was laying there, I get up to see whats going on, I see one of the men, and I start punching, I was scared and I knew and felt like I was raped, so I took it out on him. I didn't know if it was him or not.I went to the hospital, everything was fine, I can't explain it but I felt it and I keep having flash backs. What should I do ? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Kawika  +, writes (18 February 2008):
 Through my experience in the field of law enforcement, a gynecologist or sex abuse treatment center should be able to determine if penetration was made especially if you are a virgin. Your body is the best indicator of evidence. Aches, pains, and discomfort that normally isn't felt on a normal basis is pretty much conclusive. In most states any form of penetration to vaginal or anal, whether through the penis or digitally (fingers) is considered a sex assault. I have done many sex abuse cases, and your situation is not rare. It saddens me that such people are capable of doing such things, but unfortunately it is reality. You need to be more careful and aware of what you are doing or it can turn out to be much, much worse. Trust me on this one. There are a lot of players out there who are slipping "date rape" drugs into innocent girls drinks so you need to be more alert. Unfortunately, you can't be alert if you take (7) shots. Don't ever succumb to peer pressure. I am hoping that nothing has happened. Please let me know if I can help.
A
male
reader, chlez83  +, writes (18 February 2008):
I don't know to what rape is confined to but for all we know there might have not have been any penetration.Say maybe the guy was just playing/musturbating with her genitalia.Is that rape? What evidence exists that there was actual penetration? Was she a virgin before that incident or not? I know most ladies will say her conscious is the greatest evidence but even her she isn't sure.You know your body better than anyone else so you are the best person to answer that question.Did you after that day ever notice anything strange,like pain in your vagina,scratches or any form bruises? One thing you need to agree with me on is that in such circumstances,it's hard to determine whether it was rape or not.
Take care.
...............................
A
female
reader, TELLULAH  +, writes (18 February 2008):
 Hi darling,
It sounds to me like you were drugged. You say that you went to the hospital, what did they test you for? Did you explain what you think happened. And also tell them the ammount that you drunk. 7 shots is a fair ammount for a 14 year old girl, who is not used to drinking.
Unfortunatly the ammount of time that has lapsed will have destroyed any evidence that could have helped you. But you could still talk to a profesional that maybe of some use.
I hope that you get some help XXX
...............................
A
female
reader, Midge +, writes (18 February 2008):
 Having been through all of this myself I suggest that firstly you go and get an HIV test even if it was some time ago. Then you need to seek councelling at this very early stage.
You say you were 14 when it happened and from the details you give you say you are between 16 and 17 years old. So its been about 2 years since it happened. It takes a long time to deal with the emotions and the fact that you dont know what happened is the bottom line.
I was in a similar situation when my doctor put me under hypnosis and raped me. My biggest problem dealing with it was the fact that I didnt know what happened to me from start to finish. After years of therapy and blaming myself I dealt with the issues I had. Starting from the fact that I thought it was my fault right through to going after him and taking him to court.
It took me almost 10 years to deal with all the emotions and like you, my sister didnt believe me. She said that I was making it all up. Thankfully my mum and dad did, but it hurt to think that my sister didnt! I can only imagine that it will be hurting the fact that your friends dont believe you, but you have to put your chin up and go seek councilling and make sure you get an HIV test if you havent done so already! It may seem trivial but you have no idea whether you have it or not until you have those tests done. Its not a nice thing to have to deal with, especially if you feel alone, but you need to get the test done.
Perhaps you should speak to your mum and dad. It would really help having them on your side!
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2008): Honey, I'm so sorry to hear this, but this sounds like it was rape.. I think you should go to the police, although it was a while back, but whoever it was took advantage of you. They shouldn't have done this, and even if the police can't do much now, they could give you some advice or help to get over the flash backs. I hope everything works out ok honey :]
...............................
|
