A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am in a relationship with a guy for the past 11 months. I love him very much and he loves me too. But he have a lot of issues with each other. We argue a lot and make up really soon too. But I think, we do not really address the problems we have. We somehow find a way to make the other person laugh and move on as if nothing happened. But the problems remain and come up each time we have a new fight. We have really tried to sit down and discuss these problems but both of us feel our own opinions to be right and it always leads to an argument but never solves the problems. Our issues are not minor either. We have problems of insecurity, jealousy, ego and trust issues. Our latest fight was about my ex. I was in a relationship with my ex for about 8 months when things did not work out between us. I was in a mess back then, having lost my relationship, a job, and even a few of my close friends. I had known my current boyfriend as a friend then. One night, I opened my heart to him, and he kissed me, saying that he loved me and would love to care of me forever if I gave him a chance. I immediately agreed. Now he argues saying, he finds it weird that I agreed so quick and even kissed him back that night given that I was just recovering from a serious heartbreak. I might be projecting him as a mean guy, but he is not that bad. He is very loving, and cares for every little thing about me. He has changed and grown up a lot too, in the course of our relationship. He used to be a big flirt, but he hardly notices any girls these days and talks to his friends about me all the time. I do not want to lose him, but I don't know how I can make things better. I don't want to end up in a mess again, nor do I want to hurt him, because I love him very much. Please help !
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female
reader, Jolin  +, writes (13 August 2009):
 okay..i noted this
"Now he argues saying, he finds it weird that I agreed so quick and even kissed him back that night given that I was just recovering from a serious heartbreak."
if he argues again.. just ask him:" so , now what do you think the best for us?"
When you get the answer, you will know where to stand.
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