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female
age
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writes: My husband goes out everynight for a few hours to the pub friday saturday and sunday when he comes in all he does is fall asleep we have 3 teenage boys and i feel so lonley its getting to the point that i don't like him to touch me as he repulsis me he smells of drink, all christmas he was no help to me, each year i say i will not put up with him for another year but i'm still here felling like all my confidence has gone. NYE and time is 16.16 he has gone out now and will be back at about 19.00 20.00, how can i wish him a happy new year? i don't wish him one. I need help.
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female
reader, AngelofLove  +, writes (1 January 2007):
 If you husband is taking you for granted, you must tell him this to give him the opportunity to improve.
Do not sit and wait for him, go out yourself.
If the above does not work, then consider building a new life.
Good luck
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2006): If you need help then get it. Make a promise to yourself to get counselling ASAP and then keep it.
Set a goal of attending once a week and for X months.
Perspective will help you gain insight and offer you guidance on what you are thinking and feeling and why and you will discover what you need to do.
Best Wishes.
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 December 2006): If your hubby is unwilling to change his worst habits for you and the family, then you should consider divorcing him. However, as Malyce would say, "Seek marriage counselling". Alas counselling are only for those who are willing. If he's isn't willing, then it's time for you to seek happiness and stability elsewhere - even if that means being on your own. Having a divorce doesn't necessarily mean it will tear a family apart. It also depends on how responsible at least one or better, both parents are. As well, having a divorce with children in the picture is always no easy task. Weigh out your options, speak with those whom care and know your situation, and then draw your conclusions from then onwards.
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (31 December 2006):
 I think its really unfair that he goes out Friday Saturday & Sunday too, maybe one of those days would be ok. And leaving you on your own new years eve is just rotten. Have you sat down with him and spoken to him when he is sober and told him how you feel.?
It sounds like you are stuck in abit of a rut, and that you don't get out that much, he know this, and is used to you always being there there when he rolls home drunk.
I say get some hobbies, start an evening class, or have you any girlfriends you can go down the pub with? I think if you did this and he saw that you were getting out there and doing something it would be abit of a wake up call for him, show him your confident, and that you are not a push over.
All the very best of luck, and happy new year x
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