A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Got bk in contact with an ex , he used to have a nice set of teeth but 2 yrs on hes lost quite a few to be honest hes lost the front and half the back. I'm not stuck up or snotty but hes let himself rot ( I know about his lifestyle) not the best. I want him to better himself and he knows I would support him no matter what, but how could I tell him in the best / politest of ways that his teeth need sorting ? Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 January 2020): You could kindly offer to take him to a dentist and pay for it. If he agrees ask if you can go ahead and make the appointment.
A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (5 January 2020):
I don't know of any kind way to talk to him about his bad teeth. Trust me, he knows. I believe no matter how nicely you might try to talk to him it will more than likely hurt/embarrass him. I believe you are either going to have to accept him as is. He'll do something if he wants to regardless how you feel. We can't change people they have to want to change and going into any relationship thinking we can change someone leads to disappointment and disaster.
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A
female
reader, Dionee' +, writes (4 January 2020):
The average person knows when they have a cavity... Trust me, he knows that his teeth are jacked up. He just may not care.
I think it can be discussed in one simple conversation. The delivery is important though. It can be easy to offend someone when it comes to personal/dental hygiene.
Just don't become his complete support system because you may find yourself having to endure a lot. It's okay to support someone but being someone's only support can be draining. Very emotionally draining. Be sure that he is a good partner on a whole and does not constantly require you to help fix the various aspects of his life, such as this. You cannot force someone to highly regard or look after themselves. If he is within your age bracket, he knows better. He does. Again, he just probably does not care enough. In which case, you need to decide whether or not you're okay being with someone as layed back as he is when it comes to self care.
Good luck OP.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2020): If his teeth have fallen out, i'm sure he knows about it. He doesn't need his ex getting on his case about it. Shaming people does't help them feel better about themselves, caring for them regardless might.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2020): Taking aside his teeth his lifestyle is not the best so is that going to change and why are you so certain you will support him no matter what, i have to wonder do you go into relationships to save people in some way? Is supporting his lifestyle and basically being his nursemaid going to be an equal relationship?
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (4 January 2020):
He is a grown up, he knows his teeth are rotten, it doesn't matter if YOU want him to better himself but really that is up to him.
It would appear that if you are going to support him no matter what you are going to have to support him toothless.
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