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writes: Hello everyone!I have known a young lady, Vivian(22) in September who works in the same field as I do(we met at a trade exhibition).I recommended her to some students for lessons(she tutors privately), and we see each other on a weekly basis in a school where we both do lessons.I find her attractive but my mind was on another lady(with whom things did not go well).My conversations with Viviane are mostly routine, but I notice that she almost always has a smile on hew face and her eyes seem very alive when we are together.A few days ago, we talked a bit and started to discuss the theater.I asked her is she liked the theater and she replied that she did with a broad smile.I then said that I could recommend some good shows she might like to see.She said she would keep that in mind, but seemed to change moods.I think she may have wanted me to ask her to see a show together.I was testing the waters to see how she would react.I am being overly cautious but I feel our age difference(I am 38), makes it difficult for me to ask how out like I would an older woman.I now feel she would like to go out(at least to the theater!) and am thinking of taking the plunge.I would appreciate any thoughts on this matter and how to best approach Vivian.NOTE: I am 38,in good shape and reasonably well-groomed. Reply to this Question Share |
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 November 2008): I am taking a big gamble here.She is just being a normal 22 year old.I would say ask her out.But be prepared to hear a No as well.From your post I do not think she is interested.Please keep us posted.
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female
reader, Artistry +, writes (30 November 2008):
Hi there, I am happy that you are going to take the chance. My own thought is, in trying to read body language, if she has a boyfriend, it must not be serious, because she is flirting a bit with you, and she would not have been as dissappointed, when you did not ask her out before. The other thing is, about the age, as we get older, as adults the number may add up but it's the experiences that make the difference, you can be a 30 year old in number but a 50 year old in experience, and vice-versa. She is over 21, and she is only going to get older, she will be able to hold her own in my estimation, as long as she is not the giggley kind, which is cute, but not for a mature gentleman.
I think you have assessed it and made the determination, yes? :o) I would not worry about the possibility of a boyfriend at this time. Besides, there is no ring on her finger. Take care and good luck. Please stay in touch.
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reader, GD +, writes (30 November 2008):
GD is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for your advice.I will go ahead and ask her out to a play.It is just that I am a bit hesitant because of her age and the fact that I don't know if she has a BF.Still, nothing ventured, nothing gained.Thanks!
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reader, Artistry +, writes (29 November 2008):
Hi there Mr. Well Groomed, you are funny, I am not making fun of you, but that was humorous and cute. Is the lady mature for her age, and not the gigglely type 22 year old, if so, then why not ask her out? It is apparent by your words, that she is attracted to you. So ask her the next time, if she has seen any good shows lately or whatever words you want to use, and set up a time and place to go together, to enjoy the show. Time is fleeting and she is trying to wait for you to show up with a question, to which she can answer yes. You had the opening, now go for the gusto. Enjoy the company and the show. Take care.
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