A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Right, I've been dating a girl for a few weeks now, we really get on, have a lot of similar interests, and share the same sense of humour, I really like the girl to be honest.The thing is, she seems to be good at planning work, gigs, etc in her diary but when it comes to us, she tends to just say 'are you free tomorrow' at the spur of the moment and I like to plan my week with work, social things, my hobbies. Can you guys suggest a way of me suggesting pencilling a night or 2 in when we see each other without sounding heavy? I seem to find myself unsure on planning things because I don't know when she will be free.. I like being spontaneous but would also like to balance it out with plans.Thanks guys! X Reply to this Question
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (4 July 2016):
 Just simply say to her what days is she free this week so you can try and match them or vice versa so that you can plan some fun dates together! It can be real casual without sounding heavy at all.
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (3 July 2016):
 "Hey Julie, my week is filling up pretty fast. How does your week look? Do you want to meet up and do something, perhaps next Wednesday?"
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (3 July 2016):
 I can only echo what was suggested in your other one: just say it to her the way you feel. It would be nice for you to plan dates too, so ask her for dates she's free, as well as asking her to give you at least 3+ days notice. If she doesn't, stop being so available because it means she doesn't care about your time and wants everything her way.
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A
male
reader, Denizen +, writes (3 July 2016):
 There seems to be a some disparity in what you write. First you say: "I like to plan my week with work, social things, my hobbies."
Later you say: "I seem to find myself unsure on planning things because I don't know when she will be free."
"She tends to just say 'are you free tomorrow' at the spur of the moment." But then you say: "I like being spontaneous".
This doesn't make complete sense. Why don't you rewrite your question saying what you mean.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 July 2016): it is entirely reasonable to expect to be able to look forward to some events in the future. we are all busy people and it is considerate to allow some advance notice of events you may like to consider. Spontaneous has a place.But when it comes to attending an event you may not be able to get tickets at the last minute. and the joy of anticipation is denied if you cannot plan in advance, as far as what you will wear and which places sound worth visiting. It is too casual to always just spring an outing on you if she can plan other events without any problem
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