A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:So over the past few months I got to know a co-worker from a different department pretty well. He often comes over to my department to ask me research questions, and we got talking and have a LOT in common, we really click and have very similar interests. I recently went to a work night out and when I asked politely that day if he was going, he wasnt aware of it yet but jumped at the chance. He bought me a drink and also chatted to me a lot, he told me that he's very shy and puts a front on sometimes, and also mentioned that he's not good with women. I think he was trying to hint to find out if I was single, and he told me about his dating history randomly, then said 'what about you?' There's a few other things, he stayed out all night until I wanted to go home (We were the last 2 out) and when we were next back at work he came to see me that morning to check I got home safe, and he said he should have got my number to make sure I got home safe (if he was hinting, I didn't pick up on it at the time). I told my friend I like him and she said she thought he liked me back and she thought that for ages now, as he always makes excuses to talk to me. The thing is... He is quite shy and I don't think he will ask me out on a date unless he knows I'm interested. I don't have the guts to ask him ... so how can I hint to him subtly? I've tried being flirty but it's hard at work , is there anything little I can say that won't scare a shy guy off , but give him a clue I like him, or is there a way I can subtly suggest he takes my number or something? I want to keep it subtle but also enough that he realises I like him Thanks guys!
View related questions:
at work, co-worker, flirt, shy Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (5 August 2018):
 Take a few minutes to search this website for the amount of work related dramas are caused through dating.
I answered one just this morning and I’d say a hundred others over the time that I’ve been part of this website at least. Dating co-workers is a TERRIBLE idea. It very rarely works out and you’re left with a nightmare scenario of seeing an ex every single day. How do you plan on dealing with that if it arises?
You’re being paid to do a job, not find your future husband. Keep Work and love separate. Be professional at ALL times. Surely you can find someone you don’t work with?
A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (5 August 2018):
 Exhibit A of why you don’t date at work: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/my-ex-whos-also-my-colleague-has-ended.html
...............................
A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts +, writes (4 August 2018):
OP, don’t bother. Be professional. If one of you leaves the job, you can ask him out. Don’t do it whilst you still work in the same company. It’s awfully difficult to go through an uncomfortable break up when you work at the same place.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2018): One day you will learn that you don't poop where you eat, and you don't date where you work!
Only this past week we had an OP explaining her woes and fears; because she had a falling-out with a co-worker she was dating. He's on vacation and they are returning to work next week. I told her to be professional and behave as if it was just another workday.
Young people sometimes don't think past their hormones. You are in a work-setting and co-workers are NOT your dating-pool. I don't care whether they are single or shy. You work together! When things don't workout; you'll take your drama and nonsense into the workplace. You've already initiated the flirtation; so now there's no turning back. Others are watching you, and they will gossip. They will watch your every single move. You two will be everybody's focus; instead of everyone doing their jobs. Lucky I'm not your boss!
They know you two were the last to leave. That's already on the grapevine.
You'd be better-off dating guys that you don't have to see at work, if it doesn't workout. If he decides to date another co-worker; when your little thing wears-off. You'll be smitten with jealousy. That will be another on-the-job drama. Think this out before you proceed. You were hired to work, you're not at a singles-club.
...............................
|
