A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I got a question. i have friends and a few family members who want to know when i'm getting married. i have already told them that i am NEVER getting married. but for some strange reason, they keep pestering me about it. how can i put a stop to these kind of questions?how can i stop people from wanting to know when i'm getting married? i am happy being single and i am happy with my life the way it is. i don't have a girfriend at the moment and i don't care if i do or don't find one in the future.if i find a girlfriend in the future, that's great. if i don't, i don't care that much.Am i being too agressive? Should i let people ask personal questions?i have asperger's syndrome and i have resentment towards women because they wouldn't go out with me when i was young.Thanks for your support. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your answers. They made a lot of sense. I think people who have been married or are married like to force others to get married too.And you're all right. The questions will keep coming. The problem is that when I tell them that I never want to get married, they ask me if I'm gay (I'm not) or if there is something wrong with me.Maybe they should learn to mind their own business. I know that they have good intentions but I don't think it helps me one bit to listen to all their crap about marriage.I hope I do find a girlfriend one day but the problem is I have a very demanding personality. If I disagree with someone on something, I feel insecure. And I get angry.I guess we all get rejected sometimes. It's a fact of life.
A
female
reader, Lucky786  +, writes (27 June 2011):
 Tell then you're getting married on the 10th...the 10th of never! If they carry on tell them you haven't met the right woman and when you do you plan to elope.
BTW try not to let your experiences from your younger days influence or stop you from meeting the right woman if that is what you want.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2011): I hate the fact that people expect everybody to pair up and get married. A lot of people are just too dumb to understand that marriage is not the only possible way of life. They think since their main goal in life is to find a partner, it is everybody's main goal. But it isn't. When they ask you, and you answer never and they ask you again, tell them something like What part of never did you not understand?
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A
female
reader, dmartin89 +, writes (27 June 2011):
 Hi, my brother has aspergers syndrome so I understand a little about how you're feeling.
My partner and I have been together for 3 years and he is at "that age" when most men get married and have kids (he's 34, im 21) and his mum is always asking "so when are you going to settle down?" And it bugs the hell out of us.
They may never stop asking, they may stop asking. In the end you just have to ignore it, don't let it bother you.
Do you really never want to attempt dating just because some girls didn't want to go out with you when you were young?
Lets look at this logically; Would you go out with someone you didn't have any romantic feelings for? No - because it would be a waste of time and its lying to the person you are dating. Would you rather these girls had lied to you? Then broke up with you a few months down the line because they got bored of trying to pretend?
Every person gets rejected at some point in their lives. Everyone has bad experiences, but there is no reason that experience should stop you from having the most fulfilling life you can. And you shouldn't use your aspergers syndrome as an excuse to let resentment take over your life.
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A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE  +, writes (27 June 2011):
 im sure they will stop asking when your 50 and still single. on another note punishing yourself because of what others did to you is not wise .
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