A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I’m really confused and I feel as if my heart has been broken in half. My boyfriend dumped me because we didn’t know each other. My guy friend that I do have strong feelings for I think likes someone else. He writes on her wall I love you buddy and always apologizes to her. Me he never does that! I ask him if he likes her but he’s not admitting it. I told him the other day that I don’t care if he dated her but in reality it would break me. Plus I went to a lot of wakes and funerals lately which makes me sad. I only care for his happiness. I tried to move on really but that didn’t work out it just got me hurt. I told him how I felt about him but he doesn’t take me seriously. How can I stop hurting myself? I’m in really bad shape and think that nobody likes me? Please help me!
View related questions:
I love you, move on Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks those were very good answers! I would never hurt myself because I'm a very happy person and laugh all the time with friends.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2010): There's someone for everyone, and if he snoozes he loses. He sounds like kind of a sad case anyway if he apologizes constantly to some random other girl, for nothing. If you want, go and hit up another guy, and make this one jealous, and you'll feel better in the process. If you don't find anyone, go out and club it up and hit the gym, and just enjoy life. Don't feel you need some guy to make you happy, when you can achieve your own happiness and lead the way, instead of chasing or waiting after someone. Maybe if this guy sees you with another guy, he'll start to give a shit, so just have patience in life, and your turn will come, to feel like you're on top of the world. With patience comes the most success, and if you keep making new friends, you'll also heal from the loss of your other friends. You have to go out and find happiness, as it won't come to you without making yourself noticed to other friends. Don't get into a comfort zone or a rut, either. Carry on, and keep your head up. Try to surround yourself with positive people, and positive activities each day. When you make things around you positive, you make yourself feel positive.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2010): I am sorry you are hurting and I know it is tough to lose someone you trusted and loved.
I think you are kind of in a downward spiral of negative thinking and it is gaining momentum on you and taking over.
The best thing you can do is to control your mind and your thoughts. If you start to think about either of these guys, tell yourself to stop and get up and go for a walk or call a girlfriend.
I also get the gut feeling that you are not very close to one or both of your parents. It really helps when you are feeling rejected to remember that you are a worthwhile person a good girl worthy of love. Seek out the adult companionship of your parents and try to build a closer relationship with them, it can really help you heal at this age to have people who care about you and love you for who you are.
As far as the boyfriends, you are very very young so you have lot more of the same coming your way, rejection is part of life.
In times like this it is essential to turn your focus away from them on onto yourself. Remember who you are or who you want to be, set some goals for yourself, if there is something you want to learn how to do like play a musical insturment or hang gliding, sign up for a class and go for it. The best way to get rid of icky feelings is to get out of your comfort zone and try something new...and I don't mean new boyfriends.
You have got to be happy inside, confident and strong and know who you are before you can love anyone else. Work on you and you will be happier.
If you really feel like you are going to hurt yourself though, please call a crisis hotline, or tell a trusted adult how you are feeling. You may need some help, even medical help...I can't judge your condition because I don't
know you and I can't see you in person.
But know this, God doesn't make junk, and you have a purpose for being here, look for that purpose and live it everyday. No other human being can define who you are or judge you as lovable and worthy, you already are just by being here on earth. You're needed, you are important to a lot of people and tomorrow is another day, and when you wake up, guess what the sun will be shining in the sky yet another day. Your whole life is ahead of you, don't waste one more second of your youth feeling bad about yourself because some wet behind the ears punk ass boy didn't give you what you hoped for....he isn't worth your tears...
...............................
|
