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female
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anonymous
writes: I am 16. I was going with my bf for over 4 months. A little while ago, when we were out, I let him deflower me. After that, we had sex on every date. Apart from the first and second times, I made sure that he was wearing a condom so I am not pregnant. We have now split up and all the bfs I have had since want sex right away. I am sure that he told everybody everything but I only let him because I thought he loved me. I don't let the others do anything but how can I stop boys from thinking I am easy?
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female
reader, willywombat  +, writes (17 March 2006):
 Pretty simple really.
Stop dating for a while and learn to enjoy your own company.
Stop having sex with every man/boy you date/meet.
Get some self-respect.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 March 2006): Why don't you stop dating for a while? You are so young and need time to just have fun and not worry about sex or having bfs...it will take your mind off of worrying that guys might want to date you just because of your stupid ex who maybe told other people intimate details of the two of you while you had a relationship (which, by the way, he's an asshole for doing.) I really advise against dating right now because you need time to heal and feel happy about yourself without having someone with you. You have to kiss a lot of frogs before you get your prince, and your ex showed that he didn't respect you enough to 1.) not have protected sex with you in the beginning (but I commend you for making him wear it and not making a habit out of having unprotected sex) 2.) telling other people the really private stuff that ahppened between the two of you and at least he's not in your life anymore. If you see other guys coming at you trying to talk to you that maybe go to school with him or you think are his friends or acquaintances, just say no. You already have stood up for yourself by not having sex with your other bfs which is great! If they think they are going to get sex out of you, then you have abig surprise for them---it's not going to happen. I only say that maybe you should take time to be by yourself for a while because you need to be happy with yourself and come to terms with what this crappy bf did and try to hang out with your own friends that love you no matter what and just to get away from sex in general. You need to wait for a quality guy who will treat you with the respect and love you deserve without having second thoughts as to what his true intentions are. You are so right for denying your body to these other guys--you are taking control over who touches you and what happens to your body and that is a very important skill to learn--work on developing this strength you have so in the future you can give potential bfs tests and see which one is worthy of your time and which one is there to look for sex which is a person you don't want to wste your time, energy, or emotions on. Best of luck
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A
male
reader, d4u04 +, writes (16 March 2006):
 Well there's a difference between lads wanting sex and you giving it to them. If you don't want people to think you're easy then don't put out right away until you feel comfortable with it. And even if you do feel comfortable straight away and people do call you easy then don't let it get to you, kids can be really cruel but that doesn't mean they're right. Try not to let it get you down chick x
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