A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My ex just broke up with me 2 days ago... He says that I'm tooo mean... I love him dearly but what should I do??? I trip on him off of the smallest things... Help!!! I need it badd!!!:( what do I do... We live together still sooo I know that I still have a chance... I just wanna make thngs rite... I know that nothing is perfect but I just wanna stop being sooo mean..
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male
reader, Odds +, writes (9 October 2010):
 Most men do *not* want to be mothered unless they are sick. They want a girlfriend who inspires them to be better, not nags them to be better or does things for them. And sexes the hell out of them.
You know what you have to do - be nicer, don't fly off the handle, don't tear him down. Be more feminine and appreciative, more encouraging and forgiving. There's no "how" to this; you just have to do it.
The hard part will be convincing him that you've learned your lesson and are really changing. He will initially believe that you are pretending to be nicer just to get him back - wouldn't you believe the same thing in his shoes? The answer is to continue to be nice even when it's not getting you anything. This means nice to strangers on the street, waiters, coworkers, everyone - especially him.
You have to be willing to work at being sweet even when you know it's going to get you nothing. This is one of those things that will get worse before it gets better, so keep it up even if he's pulling away more at first. Give it a couple of weeks, then ask to go on a date with him to somewhere special to both of you.
A
female
reader, Lovehim4eva  +, writes (9 October 2010):
I have almost same problem. I was abit mean to my bf when i was annoyed over sumthing he dumped me 2 weeks ago and not heard of him since i love him as dearly as u love u ex i want to b wiv him agsin as i feel i cant love nobody else. Try and thibk before u do simthing thats wot i should of been doing
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A
female
reader, petina1 +, writes (9 October 2010):
 Be nice to him, no one stays where they don't feel loved. Are you unhappy about something else in your life. Try and think about that and if you realize why you arent happy, talk to your boyfriend and tell him y ou will not be mean to him again. Think of ways to focus on your behaviour when you start to want to 'peck' at him. Most men like to be mothered thats a fact.
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