A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hello, Sorry for this post being so long, i did try to shorten it.So this guy started talking to me a few months ago on facebook, I barely knew him but he seemed alright.After about a week of us talking on fb he asked why 'how does someone as pretty as you not have a boyfriend?' and then I thought he was just another guy who flirted with girls to see how far they could get. He asked me out soon after as well, but I turned him down because I just didn't know him well enough.Now that I have gotten to know him better, I can tell he isn't like that, he's the complete opposite.. he was always caring and if there was something wrong he would listen to me and try to help me as much as he could.He has asked me out about 5-10 times and I turned him down each time because I just liked to have him as a friend, not a boyfriend.I would say we know each other really well now, and hes the opposite of what I first thought of him because he wouldn't ever judge me and he would always try to help me. But something happened one night, I was in a really bitchy mood and just completley lost it with him, I got really pissed off with him for no reason and felt really really bad afterwards. After that argument there were just more and more, and I think that most of the time it was just my fault because I started them (I can be like that sometimes, i'll just snap at someone when they haven't done anything wrong, and then I'll feel really bad later on). I would always apologise to him afterwards and he would say things like 'it's all forgotten' but a few nights ago we had another argument, and he got really pissed off with me as well he said 'maybe you were right, I should move on' and all of our conversations since that argument have been awkward, its like he still hasn't completley forgiven me, and I don't blame him at all since I know I can be an awful person to have to put up with sometimes.He spoke to me yesterday and just before he left he said 'i love you' which is something he would normally say, but this time he put 'i guess' afterwards. Then I felt really bad, today it kind of hit home how much **** he out up with and I felt like a complete bitch.If anyone knows of a way I can show him That I am truly, truly sorry for everything I have ever said to him, like all of the arguments etc. I would be so, so grateful, Thankyou so much to anyone who has any advice for me, I would really appreciate it.
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male
reader, idoneitagain  +, writes (16 May 2011):
Great, well done, sounds like it was a good experience for you!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThankyou for your advice! I spoke to him lastnight and told him how sorry I was for all of the things I had said in the past. I told him about it all kinda of 'hitting home' the other day and how I reaslised how much he has helped me as a friend.
Thanks again for the advice, it was really helpful!! :)
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A
male
reader, wolfred bane  +, writes (13 May 2011):
 idoneitagain's right. if i were the guy, i would understand that you are truly repentant. BTW, don't worryabout length. the more details you have, the eaiser is it for us to understand.
Good luck!
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A
male
reader, idoneitagain +, writes (13 May 2011):
There is a way you can show him that you are truly sorry for the things you have said to him. You can use these experiences to change, to become more of the person you want to become, to learn how to stop saying things that make you feel bad after you have said them. You can start to think about why you say them in the first place. Using someone who loves you as the inspiration to become a better person is a great way of saying thank you to them. You have to want to do it for yourself, or it won't work, but we find inspiration in the people we love and the people who love us. The other thing you can do is just tell him what you are telling us, that after your last argument something hit home, that you are really sorry for the things you have said to him in the past, and that all of this really means something to you. He will appreciate it, and sharing your feelings with important people in your life is an important part of growing up and becoming an emotionally mature person. Good luck.
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