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How can I show her I am truly sorry after my affair?

Tagged as: Big Questions, Cheating, Marriage problems<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 November 2010) 4 Answers - (Newest, 6 April 2011)
A male United Kingdom age , anonymous writes:

I have had an affair I owned up and was for given but stayed in contact with other person (not fisical)I wanted to be at home with my wife who love dearly but didnt want the othere person to hate me. I was questioned about phone calls and again told my wife I had been texting her.

I had broke her heart again with 4weeks. She want to spend time apart. but I know where my heart is I feel so much pain and guilt when I am not with my wife. how can i make it up to her not being able to hold her hand or make her smile make me want to hurt my self to feel the pain I have caused her.

what can I do to show her I am truly sorry and want no one but her in my life.

View related questions: affair, text

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A female reader, 1stTimeShameOnYou United Kingdom +, writes (6 April 2011):

Maybe you should wear a large sign in the middle of a busy town centre.. Write the following on it "I cheated, this is my punishment" Think about it.. you'll make amends with your wife and make it known to other women that you are a slag.. that should stop you from cheating ever again.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (16 November 2010):

This is another cheating story gone bust!

Perhaps u need to give your wife space. U have learnt a valuable lesson and only have youself to blame.

Instead of crowding your wife and whining how sorry you are, put your mere words into actions.

Your wife is mourning the loss of her marriage and her trust in you and she is grieving the double betrayal.

Only time will tell whether she can ever forgive you.

Why are u still in touch with your lover? If u claim u love your wife so much why did you destroy her?

No use crying now. The damage is done. Not once but twice.

Have you considered what u are going to do if your wife moves on with her life (without you)

No one here can wave the magic wand and make you faithful. You need to amend your cheating ways.

LoveGirl

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A male reader, stubby1984 United States +, writes (16 November 2010):

stubby1984 agony aunti've never cheated on n e gf but this is what i do when i make her mad or fuck up in n e other way i spoil her rotten by giving her my undivided attention and cater to her by cooking for her and cleaning the house making sure she dosent have to lift a finger.give that a try just dont smother her.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (16 November 2010):

Honeypie agony auntLike Sageoldguy said, break it of with the "other woman" and do not resume contact.. Basically SHIT or get off the pot. If you want to be with your wife SHE should be the one you focus your attentions and love on.

Personally I would ASK your wife what you could/can do for her in order to start rebuilding trust. If she wants to come back to you, you will basically have to accept and follow all her"demands".

She may not take you back and you will have to accept that, after all it was your actions and inconsideration that made her leave.

Good luck.

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