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age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: The last time we (me and my boyfriend) had a sexual encounter, we were very rough (the way we both like it, no actual pain). He is also bigger than my last boyfriend (girth wise).Anyhow, I ended up with a case of 'honeymoon cystitis', I believe it was called, and had to get medicine because it caused a UTI (Urinary tract infection.) He's afraid he'll hurt me, even though it didn't hurt while we were having sex. We obviously won't be so rough, but how can I put his mind at ease? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Angels1have1wings  +, writes (11 May 2008):
 The same thing happened to me a while back with my current boyfriend.
I think with guys because they dont get much pain from sex and they've heard many horror stories on how it's painful for girls, they become very concerned and to have somthing suggest that they did hurt the woman they are with, might make them feel guilty.
With my boyfriend i told him that these sort of infections are normal and anyone can get them. Reassure him that because you know what has caused it you can both avoid it. Just keep trying to put his mind at ease by saying that he has never hurt you before and that he has nothing to feel guilty about. He may be larger than your previous partner but that clearly is not affecting you.
Maybe try and suggest that the next time you have sex, you will take it slow (even if it's not your prefered method) untill he is reassured that he is not hurting you
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