A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:About a year and a half ago, my best friend (who's a girl) finally left her complete jackass of a boyfriend behind. For a couple months now, she's been after one of my close friends (one of her friends too). At first, I was okay with helping her get with him but then I realized that I'm starting to fall for her myself.I've always had some kind of crush on her but now it's turning into something else. I already talked to my friend (the guy she currently likes); not bluntly, just asking him casual questions and he's not interested in her. So then I talked to another very good friend (a guy) and he told me to "do whatever it takes" to get her to be mine.I know she likes me. Alcohol helps you loosen your inhibitions and let them go; basically showing your true feelings and self (besides fear, of course). Everytime she told me she could see us being together in the future and getting serious... she was drunk. I want to snag her before some other jackass comes along and steals her away and makes her feel like shit all the time.I would never even THINK of hurting her in any way possible. I want to make her feel like a queen, day in and day out. How can I do this? How do I open her eyes? Should I talk to her girl friends? What should I do???
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male
reader, Odds +, writes (22 August 2010):
 Well, who do queens end up with? The kings. The best way to make her feel like a queen is to be a king. (OK, I'll leave the metaphor behind now, I promise).
Be confident, outgoing, and funny. Acknowledge that you are a sexual being, not just some eunuch friend. Flirt with her (and with other girls too, at least until you're dating her). Go out and do something crazy for fun.
The reason she dated a jackass is because he is confident, strong, and unafraid of losing her. Thoes qualities attract girls, particularly ones your age, more strongly than rudeness and lack of empathy repel. No exceptions. So, take the strong qualities and combine them with your own good qualities.
The point is, you can never directly convince a girl that dating you is the best choice, because the only person you control is yourself. You can only make yourself a great option and wait for her to make the choice. She doesn't need a servant or a personal yes-man - those are a dime a dozen. She needs a boyfriend who makes her feel like she has won the boyfriend lottery.
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