A
female
age
30-35,
*archie
writes:Helo aunts and uncles, i just want to ask a question: how do i learn to keep to dates? I find it difficult always to keep to dates and its really affectin my relationship with others. I've lost most of my friends becos i barely bring myself to hang out wit or even visit them. And im thinkin im not normal. Is there something wrong wit me? I usually call and tell dem i want to visit dem and wen the date have been fixed i disappoint dem. Its really gettin out of hand and i need help, quick help before it becomes uncontrollable. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (16 October 2013):
 Sounds like you have anxiety, more then just plain nervous. Have you tried to MAKE yourself go? I have anxieties when it comes to larger groups of people, but I have learned over the years that IF I make myself go, I usually end up having fun.
These are your friends, you shouldn't be nervous.
TRY and make yourself go. See if you can. And maybe tell a friend about how it feels, it would suck to lose a friend because they think you don't care.
A
female
reader, harchie +, writes (16 October 2013):
harchie is verified as being by the original poster of the question I'm not depressed but i do get nervous and sometimes scared. So i cancel sometimes and some other times i dont show up. I do remember the dates and prepare ahead but at the last minute i feel very nervous.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 October 2013): I'm like that too.
I'll make dates with people, but end up cancelling because I cannot be bothered/I would prefer my own company.
Although it's sometimes difficult, it's important to still socialize with others.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 October 2013): I think we may ned some more information. Is the problem that you can't remember when you've said that you'd meet them? Or do you remember but just decide not to go?
If it's because you decide not to go then you have to ask yourself why you do this? Is it because you're lazy or because you worry whether you can afford it? Or because you feel anxious that your friends might not really like you? Or that something bad might happen if you go out? Maybe you simply feel you have better things to do
If anxiety is part of the reason that you don't socialise with friends then you can get help from a doctor or counsellor.
Are you depressed? It can make you not want to do anything fun or fulfilling. That would require a doctor or counsellor to deal with too.
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (15 October 2013):
Do you JUST not show up? Or do you cancel last minute?
Do you think you are depressed? or have anxieties?
Do YOU always arrange to go see them or do they come see you as well?
...............................
|
